One reason why I would ever want my children to serve missions

This Christmas I get to receive an incredible gift. Our daughter is coming home from having served a mission in the England, Birmingham mission for The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints for the past 18 months (read about her adventures here). I am so excited to receive her smiling, happy face into my arms- I can hardly contain myself.

I also have been able to give a gift. One of our sons is serving a mission in the Argentina, Buenos Aires South mission. As I write this he has been gone for almost 3 months (you can read about his adventures here). He will be gone until September 2017. I will be able to see his face and chat with him through skype on Christmas Day, but that is the only voice contact we have until Mother's Day when I will get to talk/chat via skype again. For the past little while I have had both of these children out on missions. To be totally honest, I have really missed them immensely. I wouldn't want my children to be anywhere else even though I feel like I have a hole in my heart when I think about them too much. So, I choose to focus on the why I would ever want my children to serve missions.

This Christmas I realize even more why I am willing to do this. I love my family more than anything and I want to be with them forever. I know that families can be together forever through Heavenly Father's plan and I want other families to have this same gift of an eternal family. Because of this joy of eternal families, I am willing to send my children to foreign countries to share this "good news" (see Bible Dictionary: Gospels), even "glad tidings of great joy" (Helaman 16:14). It was proclaimed by an angel, "Fear not, for behold, I bring you good tidings of great joy, which shall be to all people" (Luke 2:10). These "glad tidings of great joy" are for all to hear and all to receive, not just for my family.

Heavenly Father's plan is to bring home all of His children who desire to come back and live with Him through faith and repentance in His Gift to all of us, His Son, Jesus Christ. He is the Gift we get to receive! Heavenly Father was willing to give His Beloved Son (see Moses 4:2, Mark 1:11, JS-H 1:17) so that we may all live with Him again. That is an incredible gift to give...your child so that others may also receive gifts- even the gift of an eternal family.

This is the reason why I am willing to give my daughter and my son to others of God's children for 18 or 24 months...that they too may receive the Greatest Gift. 

(Enjoy this short video: He is the Gift)

"Stand therefore, having...your feet shod with the preparation of the gospel of peace" (Ephesians 6:14-15)

Having been dealing with foot pain for several months now I have come to realize that perhaps I may have to deal with this pain for a long time. I did finally go to the doctor and find out that there is a problem with my feet and it's something that may not go away on its own. It was a relief to identify the problem and a little scary to learn it might not ever clear up. What can help give some relief is to have the right footwear and to make sure I am not inflicting more pain by being fashion conscious and wearing unsupported, or flimsy shoes that will make the problem worse. There's pretty good footwear out there to help alleviate the pain but, I have found the best "footwear" to be in the gospel.

Paul told the Ephesians, "Stand therefore, having...your feet shod with the preparation of the gospel of peace" (Ephesians 6:14-15). Shod means the past tense of shoed or simply put, shoe. So, put on the shoe of preparation of the gospel of peace. It's not the gospel of stress or anxiety, but of peace. I love this! Wearing the shoes that are taking me down the path of preparation and peace is very comforting and comfortable. In modern revelation we are taught, "...if ye are prepared ye shall not fear" (D&C 38:30). I think it's a good question to ask, "what am I preparing for?" I know it's a good idea to prepare for those opportunities that come to "stand in the office which [God has] appointed unto you; succor the weak, lift up the hands which hang down, and strengthen the feeble knees" (D&C 81:5 see also Hebrews 12:12; Isaiah 35:3). When we have on the right shoes, we are able to serve and help others on their journey, thus finding "joy in the journey" (Pres. Thomas S. Monson), forgetting our own pain and helping others with theirs.

To be prepared with such shoes, when we are given the correct footwear we must "bind on thy sandals" (Acts 12:8). Binding our  sandals or "shoes" on our feet is being ready and prepared for the opportunities to serve, lift, and go forward in faith. If we have them sitting in the closet and do not have them on we may lose out when we are called to serve or feel unprepared and inadequate when we are called. I love what Pres. Howard W. Hunter said about having on the right footwear:

"May I say once more to the youth of the Church (and may I add all the adults of the Church)- prepare, believe, be ready, have faith. Do not say or do or be that which would limit your service or render you ineffective in the kingdom of God. Be ready when your call comes, for surely it will come...The Lord would say to you..what the angel said long ago to Simon Peter: "Arise. ...Bind on thy sandals. ...Follow me" (Acts 12:7-8). 

So, as I deal with foot pain, and getting the right shoes on my feet, I know that we will be wise to have our feet "shod with the preparation of the gospel", it truly does bring peace and it is the most comfortable footwear out there. This I testify.

 Great idea to "bind on thy sandals" to be prepared when the waves or wind come, for they surely shall come. 

"...let your hearts be full, drawn out in prayer unto him continually for your welfare, and also for the welfare of those who are around you" Alma 34:27

At this time I have two children serving missions. My daughter is serving in England and my son is serving in Argentina (you can read their emails here and here). I get to hear from them through email once a week while they are on their missions. I can't tell you how excited I get to hear from them, hear how they are doing and all the good and hard things they experience each week. It is such a great feeling to read their letters and see how happy they are while serving Jesus Christ and teaching others of Him.

The other day, as I was praying, I wondered if this is what Heavenly Father feels like when we pray, or communicate with Him. He wants to hear from us, daily- always! We are taught over and over: "Pray always" (for example: Luke 21:36; D&C 19:38; D&C 88:126; 2 Nephi 32:9; 3 Nephi 18:15). When we pray always we draw closer to God, we open ourselves up to His protection and direction. He wants to hear from us!

Heavenly Father wants to hear how we are doing and what we are doing. I think that Amulek said it best about what we should be talking with God over, for, and about. He taught:

"Yea, humble yourselves, and continue in prayer unto him. Cry unto him when ye are in your fields...over all your flocks. Cry unto him in your houses, over all your household, both morning, mid-day, and evening. ...Cry unto him against the power of your enemies. ...Cry unto him against the devil, who in an enemy to all righteousness. Cry unto him over the crops of your fields, that ye may prosper in them. Cry over the flocks of your fields, that they may increase. But this is not all; ye must pour out your souls in your closets, and your secret places, and in your wilderness. ...and when you do not cry unto the Lord, let your hearts be full, drawn out in prayer unto him continually for your welfare, and also for the welfare of those who are around you" (Alma 34:19-27)

As a parent who gets to hear from my children once a week while they are on their missions and the joy that I have in hearing from them, I can only imagine the joy that Heavenly Father has as He hears from us, for we are physically apart from Him, just as I am separated physically from my children.

When my children email me, they will ask for items, support, prayers, and encouragement. They ask for things that are temporal and spiritual. Heavenly Father wants us to ask him for those same temporal and spiritual things that we need in our lives that will help us and lift us. A prophet taught that we should be "asking for whatsoever things ye stand in need, both spiritual and temporal; always returning thanks unto God for whatsoever things ye do receive" (Alma 7:23). Our Father in Heaven cares about us more than we can imagine. He wants to help us, and it is made possible when we ask.

As a parent I find great joy in hearing from my children. I know that our Father in Heaven wants to hear from us too. "Pray, He is there; Speak, He is listening. You are his child; His love now surrounds you. He hears your prayer; He loves the children. Of such is the kingdom... of heaven" (A Child's Prayer). He's waiting to hear from you daily. I know that praying not only brings great joy to our Father in Heaven, but also to us as we feel his love surround us as our prayers are answered. This I testify.

My daughter- serving in the England Birmingham mission

My son- serving in the Argentina Buenos Aires South mission

"...clothed with power and authority...and to go forth and carry the light of the gospel to them that [are] in darkness" D&C 138:30

I wash and fold  mountains of laundry, which I do pretty much on a weekly basis. Sometimes it's so much laundry that I take pictures of before and after. Kind of funny, but hey, sometimes I just gotta record how much laundry is done, for some reason it makes me feel better when I see what I have accomplished. 

The mountain before washing

A few years ago when I felt like I was drowning in laundry and knew that the laundry was always going to keep coming I needed a new view. This is the view I got: "And ye will not suffer your children that they go hungry, or naked; neither will ye suffer that they transgress the laws of God, and fight and quarrel one with another, and serve the devil" (Mosiah 4:14).  When I first read this I knew that I needed to make sure my children had clothes to wear. It was a symbolic gesture to make sure they were "clean" and that I was teaching them correct principles about modesty and caring for their own bodies. Doing laundry, or clothing my children is more than just teaching them to have clean clothes. I also have the vital responsibility to make sure my children are clothed with power, charity, even the armor of God. 

Christ has organized his work to be done by the righteous, those who are clothed in His power and authority. "But behold, from among the righteous, he organized his forces and appointed messengers, clothed with power and authority, and commissioned them to go forth and carry the light of the gospel to them that were in darkness, even to all the spirits of men; and thus was the gospel preached to the dead" (D&C 138:30). I know this scripture is talking about when Christ went to the spirit world to teach those who have passed away, but I feel that it also applies to us (see 1 Nephi 19:23). 

Mountain after washed, but not folded

As a mother I have the responsibility to help prepare my children to go and "carry the light of the gospel to them that [are] in darkness". This is an amazing plan- I learn truth, teach my children, and they go forth to serve and teach more of His children, and they teach their children. Doing "laundry" is part of that great plan. It has become a great blessing for me in my life and the life of my loved ones to do "laundry" and help clothe the world. 

We also get to teach our children to "clothe [themselves] with the bond of charity, as with a mantle, which is the bond of perfectness and peace" (D&C 88:125). We clothe them and ourselves with charity as we serve them, love them, and are a good example of kindness, goodness, covenant keeping, honesty, and all other Christlike qualities.

So today, as you work on the mountain of laundry that never seems to be conquered (even if it's just your own laundry), remember, you are doing a "great work" (see Alma 26:3; D&C 138:48; D&C 64:33) - you are helping clothe the world in charity and light and truth.

Mountain climbed...all washed and folded

"...clothe the naked, and to feed the hungry, and to liberate the captive, and administer relief to the sick and the afflicted" (Jacob 2:19)

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You know, some days are harder than others, especially when my expectations are higher and I over-extend myself. But, after one hard day I have learned a lot. I realize that I have not always been aware of the needs of others as well as I could be. And I also realized and continue to learn that connecting with others is so much more important than "things". The following scripture has brought on a whole new meaning to me: "And after ye have obtained a hope in Christ ye shall obtain riches, if ye seek them; and ye will seek them for the intent to do good- to clothe the naked, and to feed the hungry, and to liberate the captive, and administer relief to the sick and the afflicted" (Jacob 2:19).  Sometimes it is so easy to focus on giving in terms of money. Money I can see and say, I gave this much. But to really clothe the naked, feed the hungry is more than just offering clothing and food. It is also about clothing others spiritually and emotionally. It is also about feeding them food for the soul. When we "liberate the captive and administer relief to the sick and the afflicted" it is helping others by expressing love, concern, actually extending service no matter how small it may seem.

Over the past month I have felt a little overwhelmed by a couple of things, even though I knew I would get through them. There were two sisters (women from my church), and one of my actual sisters who did very small acts of service that showed me what it meant to "liberate the captive" and "administer relief". In preparing for my son's missionary "farewell" and knowing that I would prepare food for about 50 people I had also over extended myself in trying to serve another family member by caring for her two young children. I felt I was in over my head. These three women saw my stress, or my "captivity" if you will, and truly gave me "relief "by very simple acts of service. They could have given me money, but that actually would not have given me "relief". Instead, they gave me their love and time in very simple ways. One sister cut-up and delivered a watermelon; another sister brought over a beautiful tray of desserts, and the third sister brought delicious trays of veggies and fruits. I felt SO loved! I felt relief and my burden was made lighter! I saw, in a whole new light, that the covenant to be "willing to mourn with those that mourn; yea, and comfort those that stand in need of comfort, and to stand as witnesses of God at all times and in all things, and in all places that ye may be in" (Mosiah 18:9) is an active and real experience. It was no longer just about receiving comfort when death may come knocking, or having an ill family member, some other tragic event occurs.

These three sisters were able to mourn with me in that I felt a loss at my ability to "do it all" and I really needed help. They extended empathy and not criticism for lack of planning and over-extending myself. Rather, they recognized that I needed to be "clothed", "fed", "liberated", and given "relief". They offered comfort by their small acts of service. As they did this, I also realized they were the hands of God, they were actually standing as witnesses of God and his love for me. We get to do the same when we do seemingly small, but what ends up being significant acts of service. Throughout that day, there were many small acts of service, relief, and comfort that made that day a beautiful and wonderful day of love and joy from many other people.

Since I have had this experience I have tried to be better at not ignoring those little promptings to make that phone call, mail that letter, write the thank you, make the meal, or just hug someone, including my own children and husband! In doing this, I have had an increase of joy and love in my own life. I have also had my eyes opened to how much God really loves us and how he shares and shows that love through the service of others. This I testify.

Some of the other wonderful people who gave me relief with their small acts of service.
(Lft to rt. Sarah, Christian, Slade, Stockton, John)

Another small but wonderful act of service- helping entertain his cousin
(Ethan and James)

"...of you it is required to forgive all men" (D&C 64:10)

I have titled this "The Parable of the Chair" - (Taken from experiences I learned injuring my shoulder-twice.)

There was a woman who had a chair that she used a lot. She really liked this chair. It had been in their family for 20 years. It looked like an old school chair, had paint marks on it from when her kids painted pictures when they were little, and had earned a place that was frequented often by the woman. This chair was in her closet. It was good to her. She would sit on it to get dressed and put her shoes on. Sometimes it would be dragged from room to room to aid her in other needs. Often the woman would pour out her soul in prayer in the closet and the chair was a great source of support.

Well, one day she needed to stand on it to hide Christmas presents. She did. It was the perfect height. She hid the presents and then proceeded to turn and step off the chair. Well, she didn’t just step off, she fell off the chair. The chair had betrayed her! As she fell off the chair she landed on her shoulder. She screamed in pain. The chair did nothing. It didn’t come to her aid. It just sat there.

At first, the woman thought her should would get better by not using her arm. She was pretty ticked at the chair for betraying her trust like that. How could it let her down? She felt justified when she called it names, even refusing to sit on it to tie her shoes. Nothing the chair did (which was very little) helped her in any way to get over this hurt, this pain, this betrayal! The woman thought maybe it would help her feel better if she put it in the basement, never to be used again or even more serious, maybe she would get rid of the chair never to be allowed into her home again. She would most definitely be justified in that! But none of this helped her shoulder to heal. It had been over a month now, and the pain was still there, getting even worse. Being angry, hurt, and resentful was not helping her shoulder heal.

After a period of months the woman realized that perhaps she needed to try something different to get better. She had found no comfort and no peace in being offended by the chair. Perhaps she should see the Great Physician, who was also the Great Judge. It has been said that He “went about healing all manner of sickness and all manner of disease among the people” (Matt 4:23). Also, “he judgeth, and his judgement is just” (Mosiah 3:18). Feeling desperate, she finally went to see the Great Physician and Judge. He told her that her injury was indeed great. It would even need surgery to repair it. The Great Physician and Judge said there would probably be even more pain and tribulation to come, but if she would  “harden not [her] heart, and stiffen not [her] neck against [Him], [she] shall be [changed] and [He] would heal [her] (see D&C 112:13). She was told she needed to “view herself in her own carnal, or merely human state” and  must “apply” treatment daily (see Mosiah 4:2).

He prescribed what sounded easy, but was often difficult to take regularly. It was "to forgive one another; for he that forgiveth not his brother his trespasses standeth condemned before the [Great Physician]; for there remaineth in him the greater sin. I, the [Great Physician], will forgive whom I will forgive, but of you it is required to forgive all men" (D&C 64:9-10). He also gave her exercises to take with the prescription that would also aid in her healing and would help her become to whole again. This remedy He gave her was not easy, sometimes downright painful, but in the end totally worth it. She did exactly what the Great Physician and Judge told her to do. She practiced being obedient to His instructions. The pain subsided and eventually left. She felt so much better. She could move her arm again. She was indeed healed.

In remembering, she realizes that there is great hope for the future. If an injury occurs again, of any kind, rather than wasting time trying to place blame, she would immediately go and see the Great Physician and Judge.

"The Chair"

"I did frankly forgive them all that they had done" (1 Nephi 7:21)

Have I told you of the time when we got our van, it was a week old, I was in the parking lot of a store and a woman I knew waved at me? What happened was she proceeded to let go of her cart, it rolled down the parking lot and it hit our new van! I had a nice, round ding above the wheel well. I was so bugged, but I didn't say anything. Since then I have had two other experiences that have helped me learn from this experience. (And yes, I still see the woman regularly).

First one: middle of winter, one of the worst snow storms we had and Jeff and I are out of town. Our daughter calls us that afternoon and tells us she had hit a car in the school parking lot but had left a note on the windshield. Later that evening I got a phone call from the owner of the car. We apologized profusely, and the owner said, "Actually, I am so impressed that your child would leave a note! Thank you for teaching your child to be honest. Please don't worry about the damage to the car. Just pay it forward. Again, thanks for teaching honesty". He had totally forgiven the damage and our child and even complimented us!!!

Second one: middle of summer, late at night after picking our son up from work. He climbs into the car and proceeds to bump his door, hitting the truck next to us. I could see the ding. I went into the building and asked if anyone knew who the owner was. The owner spoke up. I proceeded to explain what happened. The owner looked at me and replied, "Oh, don't worry about it. Accidents happen. Thank you for being so honest". Another man sitting close by said, "Wow! Who comes and tells they hit another car? Why not just drive off? You don't see that very often".

I share these experiences with you because I keep thinking about how quick they were to forgive the "dings" and damage that was caused. I keep thinking about Nephi and his brothers, how they were horrible to him and after he is free from the ropes they had tied him up with Nephi says, "And it came to pass that I did frankly forgive them all that they had done, and I did exhort them that they would pray unto the Lord their God for forgiveness" (1 Nephi 7:21). To "frankly forgive" means to freely, unrestrictedly, or generously forgive someone. I see now that both of those car owners "frankly forgave" the "dings" that we had done against them. They gave us the beautiful gift of forgiveness.

We have all given and received "dings" and damage to ourselves and our loved ones. Honestly, some dings are bigger than others, sometimes the whole car is totalled. Nevertheless, we are blessed when we forgive, we aren't angry or hold a grudge. We are blessed with peace and comfort.

I no longer have my van, it got totalled by another car. But I do have a different one, and guess what? It has gotten dinged many times! There is one ding that I don't know where it came from, right above the wheel well. As I sat pondering the other incidents I came to realize that I needed to "frankly forgive", and not be angry about that "invisible" ding anymore. If it was the thing I pointed out every time someone got into my car, I would look like an angry and bitter person and I would be the one suffering. And honestly, you can't even notice it unless I point it out (thus it is "invisible"). I definitely need to "frankly forgive".

When the dings happen in life one thing we can remember is this principle of forgiveness taught by Elder Dieter F. Uchtdorf:

 "The people around us are not perfect. People do things that annoy, disappoint, and anger. In this mortal life it will always be that way.

 Nevertheless, we must let go of our grievances. Part of the purpose of mortality is to learn how to let go of such things. That is the Lord's way. 

Remember, heaven is filled with those who have this in common: They are forgiven. And they forgive" (The Merciful Obtain Mercy)

As the years have passed, my van is now gone and I have another car with dings in it. I am so grateful to those people who have forgiven me of the "dings" and damage I have unintentionally and perhaps intentionally inflicted upon them on the roads of life. My heart is not to hurt or harm. My heart is to do good. And I have been given examples of how to "frankly forgive" by those two other car owners. I'm really grateful we were honest about causing the dings so that I could have a better understanding of this principle of frankly forgiving.

Forgiveness works. It's freeing. It is the Lord's way. This I testify.

The ding that is "invisible" unless I point it out

"Wherefore, be not weary in well-doing, for ye are laying the foundation of a great work. And out of small things proceedeth that which is great" (D&C 64:33)

I have become very aware of the fact that most of my days have a similar ring or flare to them. I do scripture study, I exercise, I help my family, laundry always piles up. I make dinner and pretty much I do these same activities every day. So when someone asks how are things going or what's new, I think, nothings new and everyday is pretty much the same. I do like it when things are calm and life is pretty predictable. I like that I can count on only having to deal with small bumps in the road during the day (most of the time, so that when the big bumps come I am more prepared). But sometimes I think that I am hardly doing anything and when I had that thought today this scripture came clearly to my mind and truly touched my heart: "Wherefore, be not weary in well-doing, for ye are laying the foundation of a great work. And out of small things proceedeth that which is great" (D&C 64:33). Even though I didn't do anything different or out of the ordinary I realized that I am doing good. And that's great!

When we feel like our days are the same and we aren't making any difference, remember, it is out of the small things that great things happen (see Alma 37:6). When the laundry keeps piling up (and it does) and the dinners might seem like the same old recipes (and they are) and the time driving our children here and there and everywhere seems to take up all our "spare" time (and it does) remember that we are "well-doing" and we are "laying the foundation of a great work". God's children, our families, and our relationships that span the eternities is the great work! God wants us to be together forever. When we take the time to fold clothes with our children and listen to them, gather together for dinner and share about our day, or listen in the car about what they are interested in or perhaps frustrated with, we are laying the foundation of a great work, even the great work of an eternal family. As Paul said to the Galatians, "And let us not be weary in well doing: for in due season we shall reap, if we faint not" (Gal. 6:9).

Today was pretty similar to all my other days. And you know what? It was a day of great work and I am so grateful I got to spend my time "in well-doing". Keep up the great work! You're doing amazing things. This I testify.

I got to hang out while my son put together...well-doing.

Putting on the rain cover

Hammock hung and son inside...great work!

"And thus we see that by small means the Lord can bring about great things" (1 Nephi 16:29)

On one of my trike rides I couldn't get my front derailleur (the rings in front that help you change gears) to stay in place. I actually had to hold it in place so that it would stay in a harder gear. I thought for sure it was going to cost me a fortune to fix. I rode 35 miles holding it in place, and cut my ride short because I couldn't do brakes and hold the gear in place at the same time without some difficulty. So, a few hours after my ride, and having looked things up on the internet and trying to figure it out, I showed my son the problem. He said, I think it's really simple, got out a small bike tool and simply tightened up a screw! It was such a simple solution and now I can ride again!

I thought this is exactly like the gospel. Sometimes, we want to make things really complicated and hard- perhaps it feels more comfortable when we make it complicated? I don't know. But what I do know is that it's always the simple things that make a difference. Like when Nephi's bow was broken, his family "did begin to murmur exceedingly, because of their sufferings and afflictions in the wilderness" (1 Nephi 16:20).  They blamed Nephi and complained and did nothing. Unfortunately, there are times in my life that I do the exact same thing. I "hold the gear in place" rather than find the simple solution of tightening a screw...it seems "easier" to just go forward with things awry and not take the time to fix a small problem.

Nephi wasn't sucked in by the negativity, instead, Nephi went about doing the simple task of making another bow and then arming himself with these simple tools to obtain food (see 1 Nephi 16:23). As I thought about how Nephi armed himself, I realized that there are things we can do to arm ourselves as well, and keep the "screw" tight. These simple things are reading our scriptures, saying our prayers, attending church so that we can partake of the sacrament and renew our covenants with God and be filled. I know that all too often we want something "more"- more than the simple answers of "say your prayers, attend church, read your scriptures". Well, I'm here to say that those are the "small and simple things" that will actually bring about "great things" and "confound the wise" (Alma 37:6-7). It is the simple solution that has changed my life and opens me up to receive more. 

After obtaining direction from the Lord through the Liahona on where to obtain food, Nephi makes this statement: "And thus we see that by small means the Lord can bring about great things" (1 Nephi 16:29). I like the words, "And thus we see". When I take off the "natural" (see Mosiah 3:19) or "carnal" (see Alma 36:4; Romans 7:14) spectacles that I so frequently wear, I do "see" that God works "by small means [and] can bring about great things" (1 Nephi 16:29). Just like with the small screw that needed to be tightened and made a big difference in my gears and ability to ride my trike safely again. I have found the small things of reading the words of God, praying, and attending church opens our hearts and minds to the things of God. And we can also say, "And thus we see" as we make these small changes, or simply said, tighten a  screw so that we can keep moving forward.

The little screw that needed tightening and made all the difference

"Charity never faileth" (Moroni 7:46)

In Relief Society recently we were talking about enduring to the end...and the sister teaching the lesson said that some days feel like eternity and that they will never end. How does one endure those kind of days? We all have them. No one is exempt from those days that can't end soon enough but sometimes last for more than a day, perhaps even weeks. And for some, they may even last a life time. I am thinking about all these incredible women I get to associate with and all of them have endured great difficulties in their lives. I admire them. I respect them. I love them for being who they are. I love them because they have and continue to endure all that is required and given to them (see Mosiah 3:19).

Enduring to the end. It doesn't have to be done with bells on, or even with a joyful noise. Sometimes, the enduring is done with outright screaming and yelling and perhaps even some cuss words may slip out. But it means we don't give up. Enduring is the longest part of the refining process. And this is often when we are truly chosen. The prophets teach us that we are chosen in this refining process: "Behold, I have refined thee, but not with silver; I have chosen thee in the furnace of affliction" (Isaiah 48:10; see also 1 Nephi 20:10). We are chosen when we are burning hot in the midst of our affliction and we endure!

I have to relate this to riding my trike because when I am climbing a steep hill, my legs burning, and I am pumping my guts out I think, "And you enjoy this?" And I have to reply, "Yes, I do!" Why?! Because I am enduring, I keep pumping and I might be slow, but it is steady progress. I get so happy that I am actually making progress, as painful as it is, that I exhale a, "Yeah!" between the gasps for more air. Sometimes I have had objects thrown at me or even been flipped off by the driver coming the opposite direction and I think, "Really?!"

There are also times when a rider passes me by and gives me emotional relief as I continue to pedal with words such as, "Awesome!", "Sweet ride!", or "Nice work!".  I sometimes want to say, "This is so freaking hard! Don't you realize that I can't stand up and use my body weight, and my trike is 40 lbs heavier than your bike?" But I don't say those things. Rather, I usually say, "Thanks!" and "Enjoy your ride"! I realize that we are both climbing, we are both working hard, and it is so much work to pedal no matter what you are riding. Pain is pain, and work is work. What is really awesome is the encouragement from others which helps me get to the top, endure and keep making progress even when the climb seems endless. This is charity at its finest (see Moroni 7:45-47).

When I get to the top I am so happy!!!! I actually have been known to let out a loud, "WAHOOO!" as I sail down the other side. I am happy because I have endured and I am actually stronger for having climbed the steep hill. James said it best, "Behold, we count them happy which endure" (James 5:11). This is true.

I love Relief Society because it is about relief. Elder John A. Widtsoe said, "[The] work of...Relief Society...[is the] relief of all that hinders the joy and progress of woman" (Daughters in My Kingdom, pg 25).  As sisters in the Lord's organization for women and as sisters in the gospel we get to help each other keep going up the hills, the long climbs, and sometimes those climbs that never seem to end. In so doing we are fulfilling our covenants in which we are "willing to mourn with those that mourn; yea, and comfort those that stand in need of comfort, and to stand as witnesses of God at all times and in all things, and in all places that [we] may be in, even until death..." (Mosiah 18:9).

Keep climbing sisters! We are in this together. And we will make it through those days or climbs that feel like eternity because we love one another and encourage each other. Truly, "Charity never faileth" (Moroni 7:46). This I testify.

One of the riders who passed me and gave me good encouragement.

A group of motorcycle riders heading in the opposite direction. They gave me nods and waves of encouragement

The reward of getting to the top- awesome view! And I get to fly down the other side!
(I went faster than the speed limit on the descent)

I love seeing cool things on my rides. A dinosaur in someones back yard made of metal. Love it!

"God created man in his own image, in the image of God created he him; male and female created he them" (Genesis 1:27)

I have been at war for far too long. I have been battling the belief that my body is "fat", "ugly", "overweight", that I am not beautiful. It is a never ending assault on what is real. I  have fought to believe and see that my body is beautiful in any way. I am realizing more and more that I am not alone in this battle that is wreaking havoc on how we, as a society, view and treat the human body. Being bombarded with messages that one is too big, not thin enough, not light or dark enough, has the wrong hair color or style, needs longer eyelashes, or perhaps even more "painting" on the perfect masterpiece (for we are masterpieces!!) makes one doubt that they could possibly be beautiful. So we are told and sold on the ideas that we just need to do "more"- more "painting", more exercise (don't get me wrong, I like exercise, but to excess, not good), cut a little here, or snip a little there, and before you know it, we are a completely different person than who we really are, and not any more at peace than before all the work, time, money, heartache, and "change".

I'll be honest, the inner battle can be relentless. I have said some of the most unkind, belittling, mean, and degrading things to myself- about me. I am actually embarrassed by some of the things I have said about myself. Also, I have hated my body to the point of saying and believing that, "I am not my body". Well, I am wrong. Very wrong!

I am my body! We are our bodies! We can't divorce our bodies. We are taught, "the spirit and the body are the soul of man" (D&C 88:15). I have been horribly mistaken in hating my body, always degrading it and finding fault with it. The one being, who would would like us to believe that our bodies are ugly or to hate them doesn't even have a body (Satan), and so he celebrates when we hate our bodies or are envious of other peoples bodies. Part of the challenge in this life  is to not only love our bodies (not in the worshipping sort of way where we are always working out or are fixated on the number of calories we eat or burn, or worried so much about how we look that we can only "see" ourselves and not for what we really are), but to know the truth -which is "knowledge of things as they are, and as they were, and as they are to come" (D&C 93:24).

The truth about our bodies is that "God created man in his own image, in the image of God created he him; male and female created he them" (Genesis 1:27; see also Moses 2:27). That's a pretty powerful truth! We are not made after the image in a magazine. The value and identity of who we really are is an eternal truth. The prophets testify and teach of this truth today. We are taught: "All human beings- male and female- are created in the image of God. Each is a beloved spirit son or daughter of heavenly parents, and as such, each has a divine nature and destiny. Gender is an essential characteristic of individual premortal, mortal, and eternal identity and purpose" (The Family: A Proclamation to the World). As I seek to understand and really apply this knowledge about being created in the image of God and that I have a divine nature and destiny I am able to see with new eyes the human body. It is a masterpiece for us to "perform our labors" while here on this earth (Alma 34:32). The body makes it possible for us to learn of Christ, and become like Him. It is not something to hate, degrade, loath, or any such horrors. Rather, it is a temple of God, a sacred edifice that houses the spirit of God, which temple we are (see 1 Cor. 3:16-17)!

Another amazing truth is that our bodies will eventually be resurrected after we die. This means that "the spirit and the body shall be reunited again in its perfect form" (see Alma 11:43). Now, this resurrection, or "this restoration shall come to all, both old and young, both bond and free, both male and female, both the wicked and the righteous; and even there shall not so much as a hair of their heads be lost; but everything shall be restored to its perfect frame" (Alma 11:44). This is the truth about our bodies "as they are to come" (D&C 93:24)

Okay, so why in the world are we so mean and belittling of such an incredible gift from God, even when we know the truth? I have and continue to practice (remember, I'm a practicing christian, not a perfect one) on viewing my body as it "really is". Here's one thought that I continue to ponder that helps me see my body as it really is.

The truth is we are commanded to "love thy neighbor as thyself" (Matt. 19:19; D&C 59:6; Leviticus 19:18). I would never speak to a neighbor like the way I have spoken to myself, ever! When I started thinking about how I talk to myself and the commandment to love my neighbor as myself, I knew that I needed to be more patient, kind, loving, and forgiving of myself and of my body! As women and men of God we seek to be more Christlike in our actions and thoughts, this would include being more Christlike in our attitudes towards our own bodies and ourselves. No one has a "perfect" body. (What is the perfect body anyway? A size, shape, color, what?) Actually, our bodies are the perfect setting for us to learn and prepare to meet God... and it definitely has nothing to do with size, shape, or color. Elder David A. Bednar said,

"Our physical bodies make possible a breadth, a depth, and an intensity of experience that simply could not be obtained in our premortal existence. Thus, our relationships with other people, our capacity to recognize and act in accordance with truth, and our ability to obey the principles and ordinances of the gospel of Jesus Christ are amplified through our physical bodies. In the school of mortality, we experience tenderness, love, kindness, happiness sorrow, disappointment, pain, and even the challenges of physical limitations in ways that prepare us for eternity. Simply stated, there are lessons we must learn and experiences we must have, as the scriptures describe, "according to the flesh" (1 Nephi 19:6; Alma 7:12-13) (We Believe in Being Chaste).  

As I fight the war to love my body, and to see the truth of this beautiful temple I have been given, I realize that I am not alone, and neither are you. We are in this fight against the false idea that we are not our bodies and that we are less than enough. We are created in the "image of God"(Genesis 1:27) , the Master Himself! As we ask to see with new eyes the truth about our bodies, "things as they are, as they were, and as they are to come" (D&C 93:24) and as we live the commandment to love our neighbor as ourselves, we will win this war. Yes, we shall "come off conqueror, yea, that [we] may conquer Satan" (D&C 10:5).


Pictures of me. I will continue to fight the war that is full of false truths...and I shall come off conqueror! Love your body and love yourself...you are created in the image of God.

Learning to appreciate the temple I have been given 

the truth: we will all be resurrected! 

So grateful for a body to ride my trike! 

My beautiful daughter, our neighbor or son from another mother when he got home from his mission, and me.

"...apply the atoning blood of Christ " Mosiah 4:2

So, on my long ride this past weekend I forgot to put sunscreen on my legs. Don't ask me how I forgot my entire legs...but I pretty much did. Since I have been riding there always seems to be some spot or little place that I miss applying sunscreen. I really do not like the pain of sunburn. As I have pondered how to remember or make sure I put it all over I have come up with a few ideas of how this applies to life.

This is really simple. Apply "Son-screen" and you won't get burned. How does one apply "Son-screen" you might ask? We must first view ourselves in our "carnal state, even less than the dust of the earth". This means that we have the honest view of ourselves that we all need help, divine help. We all sin, or "miss spots" and get burned. Therefore, we must ask for help, and seek for forgiveness of our sins just as the people of King Benjamin did. They "cried aloud with one voice, saying: O have mercy, and apply the atoning blood of Christ that we may receive forgiveness of our sins, and our hearts may be purified; for we believe in Jesus Christ, the Son of God..." (Mosiah 4:2). Their desire was to have their hearts purified, and this was done by applying the atoning blood of Christ by having faith in Him, living the gospel, and relying upon grace that changes all of us as we repent and turn to Christ. This is applying "Son-screen".

To "apply the atoning blood of Christ" protects us and keeps us safe from the burns of life. Through applying "Son-screen" we repent of our sins, learn and follow truth, and as the Spirit becomes stronger in our lives through the application of "Son-screen" we are changed, even a "mighty change...that we have no more disposition to do evil, but to do good continually" (Mosiah 5:2).

For me, the best and most effective ways of applying "Son-screen" daily is to "search the scriptures" (see John 5:9; Jacob 7:3; Acts 17:11; 3 Nephi 10:14), pray always (see 3 Nephi 18:15; D&C 88:126; Luke 21:36), and to "live the gospel". Pres. Hinckley said, "Live the gospel. That is the greatest challenge we face. It is a simple declaration, but encompassed in those few words is a mandate applicable to each of us. It concerns our home and family life. It concerns our daily work. It concerns our activities and responsibilities as men and women, brothers and sisters, in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. ...Let us resolve within our hearts to more fully live the gospel" (Live the Gospel).

So, this may be simply said, but it is totally worth the time and effort: apply sunscreen daily. As we apply the "real stuff", the "Son-screen", we will be protected and find comfort in knowing that we won't have to endure the pain that comes from getting burned. And then you can really enjoy the ride!

Here are my legs after my long ride...yup I forgot to apply sunscreen on pretty much all my legs. 

"God looketh on the heart" (1 Sam. 16:7)

I am a mother. I am a stay-at-home mom. I am a homemaker. By the world's measuring stick  of "value", I am not worth very much. I don't make any money and there is not a real way to measure what I do. So, I am practicing  measuring myself by the Lord's standards and not the standards of the world. Some days it is easier than others to feel my own value and worth than others. I keep practicing. And I ask myself, "How do I measure up"?

For me, being a mother is part of who I am. I believe that it is a part of all women, whether or not we have children, and it is up to us to develop our mothering "skills". Someone once said to me that some women aren't "naturally inclined to being a mother". My response is that they can choose to develop those mothering qualities and abilities just as they would learn to work hard, learn to cook, learn to read. It takes time to develop the skills of a mother...and what are those skills? Honestly, I think the skills for being a mother or a good parent even, are to "...be humble, and be submissive and gentle; easy to be entreated; full of patience and long-suffering; being temperate in all things; being diligent in keeping the commandments of God at all times; asking for whatsoever things ye stand in need, both spiritual and temporal; always returning thanks unto God for whatsoever things ye do receive. And see that ye have faith, hope, and charity, and then ye will always abound in good works. (Alma 7:23-24). As I type this list, I realize that none of these can really be measured at all. And some days I feel rather ungrateful...and I don't give thanks "for whatsoever thing [I] do receive." So I keep practicing, and it's hard work.

These skills are what will help me as a mother, as a wife, a sister, a friend, a neighbor. Do I dare ask, "How are you measuring up?"

The world would say I am nothing...God says he will make me great. I trust God.

I am not always great at working on these skills. Sometimes I get a little sidetracked and am slow to respond or decide I need to work on some other worldly aspect. But in the end, these are the skills that God wants me to develop. It's not popular to be submissive and gentle. If I did what popular media tells me to do I would seek for revenge and make sure everyone gets what I think they deserve- especially if they have hurt me or one of my loved ones.

God's measure of my greatness is about my heart. "God looketh on the heart" (1 Sam. 16:7). Man looks on the outward appearance. I like this thought about women working on building a home for their families and the contributions they make:

"Women who make a house a home make a far greater contribution to society than those who command large armies or stand at the head of impressive corporations. Who can put a price tag on the influence a mother has on her children, a grandmother on her posterity, or aunts and sisters on their extended family?
We cannot begin to measure or calculate the influence of women who, in their own ways, build stable family life and nurture for everlasting good the generations of the future. The decisions made by the women of this generation will be eternal in their consequences. May I suggest that the mothers of today have no greater opportunity and no more serious challenge than to do all they can to strengthen the [home]” (Standing for Something: 10 Neglected Virtues That Will Heal Our Hearts and Homes [2000], 152). (Finding Lasting Peace and Building Eternal Families).

Another statement about measuring by Pres. Ezra Taft Benson says: "The best measure of true greatness is how Christlike we are" (A Christ Centered Life). That's a pretty high measuring rod. Are we measuring up?

This is the measure I practice living my life by. I make mistakes, but I am practicing and that means I will make mistakes.

I want to make a difference for my family. I want to strengthen our home so "that our children may know to what source they may look for the remission of their sins" (2 Nephi 25:26). I want to teach and lead by example. I want to be a better wife, a better friend, a better woman, a better daughter of God. I must let go of the worlds measure and open my heart to God's measure. I am enough because I am God's. I will keep practicing these mothering skills. It's all in a days work.

"...a man would get nearer to God by abiding by its precepts, than by any other book" (Introduction of the Book of Mormon)

I have a question ... and you don't have to answer it. Just ponder it.

If there was a way for you to be healed, spiritually healed, and it was pretty simple, say, reading a part of a book every day and doing what it taught, would you do it?

Here is what led me to these thoughts. In my scripture study today, I had started studying the Book of Mormon again (get your free copy here). I reread part of the introduction, which I rarely do. Well, Joseph Smith, who translated the Book of Mormon, said: "I told the brethren that the Book of Mormon was the most correct of any book on the earth, and the keystone of our religion, and a man would get nearer to God by abiding by its precepts, than by any other book" (Introduction of the Book of Mormon). To get nearer to God by abiding by the precepts, which is "a commandment or direction given as a rule of action or conduct" (precept) is a very powerful promise. I would love to get nearer to God by reading from a book and follow its teachings...sounds pretty simple.

Another question: If a prophet of God said you could be saved from a poisonous snake bite by just looking up at a serpent on a pole, would you do it? Well, in the Bible, Moses was told by God to, "Make thee a fiery serpent, and set it upon a pole; and it shall come to pass, that every one that is bitten, when he looketh upon it, shall live" (Numbers 21:8). The Israelites had been complaining against the Lord for the food they had, the location they were in, and the way they were going. Symbolically speaking, they were on a crooked path. So, the Lord "sent fiery serpents among the people, and they bit the people; and much people of Israel died" (see Numbers 21:6 (4-6)). In the Book of Mormon, we get even more of the story.

"And He did straiten them in the wilderness with his rod; for they hardened their hearts, even as ye have and the Lord straitened them because of their iniquity. He sent fiery flying serpents among them; and after they were bitten He prepared a way that they might be healed; and the labor which they had to perform was to look; and because of the simpleness of the way or the easiness of it, there were many who perished" (1 Nephi 17:41). All they had to do was look! And because it was so simple, some chose not to look and there were many who perished. How sad is that?

Well, I go back to my first question. If you could be healed by doing something simple, such as reading out of a book and then applying its principles daily, would you do it? We have been promised by a prophet of God that we would "get nearer to God by abiding by [The Book of Mormon's] precepts, than any other book". For me, drawing nearer to God heals me.  I have days where I murmur and complain about the food I have, or the place I am- whether it is spiritually or physically, I sometimes get discouraged. There are days when I feel like I have "fiery serpents" all around me, biting we with dark thoughts or negativity, and I am poisoned. But, to be healed...I just need to look. And some days, I have to look more than once.

And on those days when I look, which I try to do every day, I am healed. All the prophets, past, and present, testify of God's healing power and the reality that Jesus is the Christ. One prophet taught, "And as many as should look upon that serpent should live, even so as many as should look upon the Son of God with faith, having a contrite spirit, might live, even unto that life which is eternal" (Helaman 8:15). What a promise- if we would look upon the Son of God with faith we would live, even unto that life eternal. I want to live today. It feels so good!

As the Book of Mormon prophet Alma said to his son Helaman, I also say to you and to myself: "O my [friend], do not let us be slothful because of the easiness of the way; for so it was with our fathers; for so was it prepared for them, that if they would look they might live; even so it is with us. The way is prepared, and if we look we may live forever" (Alma 37:46).  I have learned from my own experience, that looking to God, even reading from The Book of Mormon on a daily basis will help heal and draw us nearer to Him than any other self-help or do-it-yourself book. This I testify.

Moses and the Brass Serpent, by Judith Mehr

"He did cause that his people should cry unto the Lord for strength against the time that the robbers should come down against them" (3 Nephi 3:12)

In my scripture study today, reading about the Gadianton robbers and the Nephites who were trying to protect themselves from the robbers (see 3 Nephi 3) led me to ponder "robbers" in our day. We have robbers of all kinds, they sneak into our homes and rob us of virtue, peace, family, joy, liberty, and many other God given gifts. But there are ways to protect ourselves from these robbers.  Here are some thoughts about how to protect our families from the robbers in our day:

The Nephite governor, Lachoneous, "was a just man, and could not be frightened by the demands and the threatening of the a robber" (3 Nephi 3:12). I love that the leader of the righteous people was not frightened by a robber. As a parent, and governors of our homes, we too, do not need to be frightened by the robbers who want to steal away our peace, safety, and freedom. Rather than succumb to fear, we can act as the governor did. "He did cause that his people should cry unto the Lord for strength against the time that the robbers should come down against them" (3 Nephi 3:12). I love this! We have been given great advice by our prophets to gather our families in prayer. "Never hesitate to gather your family around you for your prayers, especially in those times when more than morning and evening family prayer is needed. Extra needs require extra prayers" (Pres. Spencer W. Kimball). Crying unto the Lord for strength offers us protection against the robbers that are waiting to steal all that is precious from us.

United in learning offers protection 

Another point that jumped out at me was that the governor didn't just pray and then wait for God to do all the work. No, the governor then acted by "gathering together [his people], their flocks, and herds, and all their substance...unto one place" (3 Nephi 3:13). I see this as the same advice we have had from our leaders to protect our families by gathering together for Family Home Evening each week and teach correct principles that keep us safe from these "robbers". I like what Elder Scott had to say about gathering together for family home evening. "The structure of your evening is not as important as the time invested. The gospel should be taught both formally and informally. Make it a meaningful experience for each member of the family. Family home evening is a precious time to bear testimony in a safe environment; to learn teaching, planning, and organizational skills; to strengthen family bonds; to develop family traditions; to talk to each other; and more important, to have a marvelous time together!" (Make the Exercise of Faith Your First Priority). Gathering our families together offers great protection against those robbers who seek to destroy our homes. This gathering of our families can extend beyond our immediate family to the gathering of loved ones, friends, neighbors, and communities. Uniting together strengthens ties, bonds, and love for each other. When correct principles are taught, we gain the courage to govern ourselves when we are threatened by "robbers".

The next thing the governor of the land did was: "he caused that fortifications should be built round about them, and the strength thereof should be exceedingly great" and then "he caused that armies...should be placed as guards round about to watch them, and to guard them from the robbers day and night" (3 Nephi 3:14). We too must put "fortifications" around our homes and families and guard them against robbers. Putting filters in place helps with the robbers that come through the internet. But ultimately we must teach our children to be their own guards of their spirituality and purity by aiding them in gaining a powerful testimony of the saving power of Jesus Christ. Sister Linda S. Reeves taught this powerful truth. "Brothers and sisters, how do we protect our children and youth? Filters are useful tools, but the greatest filter in the world, the only one that will ultimately work, is the personal internal filter that comes from a deep and abiding testimony our our Heavenly Father's love and our Savior's atoning sacrifice for each one of us" (Protection from Pornography- A Christ-Focused Home).

We don't need to be afraid of the robbers that are waiting to "sally forth from the hills, and out of the mountains, and the wilderness, and their strongholds, and their secret places" (3 Nephi 4:1). No. We "cry unto the Lord for strength against the time that the robbers should come down against [us]" (3 Nephi 3:12)  and then we prepare. For "if ye are prepared ye shall not fear" (D&C 38:30). I know that we are made strong as we govern our families in faith and press forward as we act upon the council that has been given to us from the Lord. It is a great comfort to me as a mother to know that I need not fear the robbers that are there, but that we will be strengthened, protected, guided, and aided through the wars that are ahead as we live the testimonies we have of the power of Jesus Christ. This I testify.

Gathering with family and loved ones...definitely good protection with this bunch!

Love gathering together with grandma and grandpa!