"...but the Lord looketh on the heart." (1 Samuel 16:7)

Day #26

I am thankful for this scripture as it teaches me to "look" the correct way.

"But the Lord said unto Samuel, Look not on his countenance, 

or on the height of his stature; because I have refused him: 

for the Lord seeth not as man seeth; for man looketh on the outward appearance, 

but the Lord looketh on the heart."

(1 Samuel 16:7)

I love that the Lord teaches us to not look on the "outward appearance", but to look on the heart. The Lord knows our hearts. He knows our suffering, our heartaches, our love, our dreams, our hearts true desires. God knows us and the "thoughts and intents" of our hearts (D&C 33:1).

In a society where appearance is such a focus, it is sometimes hard to notice what really matters, the heart of others. This includes seeing myself from the heart and not the "outward appearance". It takes sincere effort to stop looking at "appearance", but to "look on the heart".

I hope that I "look on" others from the heart, that I may see as He does. I'm working on it. (Good thing I am a practicing Christian.)

Hopefully I "look" the right way, at others and myself.

"God looketh on the heart" (1 Sam. 16:7)

I am a mother. I am a stay-at-home mom. I am a homemaker. By the world's measuring stick  of "value", I am not worth very much. I don't make any money and there is not a real way to measure what I do. So, I am practicing  measuring myself by the Lord's standards and not the standards of the world. Some days it is easier than others to feel my own value and worth than others. I keep practicing. And I ask myself, "How do I measure up"?

For me, being a mother is part of who I am. I believe that it is a part of all women, whether or not we have children, and it is up to us to develop our mothering "skills". Someone once said to me that some women aren't "naturally inclined to being a mother". My response is that they can choose to develop those mothering qualities and abilities just as they would learn to work hard, learn to cook, learn to read. It takes time to develop the skills of a mother...and what are those skills? Honestly, I think the skills for being a mother or a good parent even, are to "...be humble, and be submissive and gentle; easy to be entreated; full of patience and long-suffering; being temperate in all things; being diligent in keeping the commandments of God at all times; asking for whatsoever things ye stand in need, both spiritual and temporal; always returning thanks unto God for whatsoever things ye do receive. And see that ye have faith, hope, and charity, and then ye will always abound in good works. (Alma 7:23-24). As I type this list, I realize that none of these can really be measured at all. And some days I feel rather ungrateful...and I don't give thanks "for whatsoever thing [I] do receive." So I keep practicing, and it's hard work.

These skills are what will help me as a mother, as a wife, a sister, a friend, a neighbor. Do I dare ask, "How are you measuring up?"

The world would say I am nothing...God says he will make me great. I trust God.

I am not always great at working on these skills. Sometimes I get a little sidetracked and am slow to respond or decide I need to work on some other worldly aspect. But in the end, these are the skills that God wants me to develop. It's not popular to be submissive and gentle. If I did what popular media tells me to do I would seek for revenge and make sure everyone gets what I think they deserve- especially if they have hurt me or one of my loved ones.

God's measure of my greatness is about my heart. "God looketh on the heart" (1 Sam. 16:7). Man looks on the outward appearance. I like this thought about women working on building a home for their families and the contributions they make:

"Women who make a house a home make a far greater contribution to society than those who command large armies or stand at the head of impressive corporations. Who can put a price tag on the influence a mother has on her children, a grandmother on her posterity, or aunts and sisters on their extended family?
We cannot begin to measure or calculate the influence of women who, in their own ways, build stable family life and nurture for everlasting good the generations of the future. The decisions made by the women of this generation will be eternal in their consequences. May I suggest that the mothers of today have no greater opportunity and no more serious challenge than to do all they can to strengthen the [home]” (Standing for Something: 10 Neglected Virtues That Will Heal Our Hearts and Homes [2000], 152). (Finding Lasting Peace and Building Eternal Families).

Another statement about measuring by Pres. Ezra Taft Benson says: "The best measure of true greatness is how Christlike we are" (A Christ Centered Life). That's a pretty high measuring rod. Are we measuring up?

This is the measure I practice living my life by. I make mistakes, but I am practicing and that means I will make mistakes.

I want to make a difference for my family. I want to strengthen our home so "that our children may know to what source they may look for the remission of their sins" (2 Nephi 25:26). I want to teach and lead by example. I want to be a better wife, a better friend, a better woman, a better daughter of God. I must let go of the worlds measure and open my heart to God's measure. I am enough because I am God's. I will keep practicing these mothering skills. It's all in a days work.

"The Lord seeth not as man seeth; for man looketh on the outward appearance, but the Lord looketh on the heart." (1 Samuel 16:7)

Whenever people come to visit my house and I get self conscience of how clean or dirty it may or may not be, I always think to myself, and may even say to the person coming to visit, “Just so you know, we don’t live in a magazine, we live in our house”. As I have pondered living in a magazine I have come to the conclusion that we do the same with our bodies. We don't live in "magazine bodies", we live in our physical bodies that have aches and pains, bruises, scars, weight, height, and health issues. The world would have us believe we need to have a “magazine body". That there is the “perfect shape” or “condition”, but it’s always changing with new fads and fashions that come and go so we never know what really is the "perfect magazine" shape.

As a teenager I had cystic acne, this is not your normal teenage acne of one or two zits, but cysts that cover your face. It was so painful I couldn’t even have my hair touch my face and I felt incredibly unattractive. At my age, even now, I have scars from this wonderful gift that I was given. I look back and realize that it was a gift. It has helped me see with different eyes. Eyes of compassion and caring, understanding and love. It wasn’t a “magazine face”. I share this with you because I believe that we all have challenges with our bodies, whether it is shape, size, color, hair, scars, age, height, weight, health, whatever it may be, each tailored to help us grow, appreciate, and understand our true worth. "Remember the worth of souls is great in the sight of God" (D&C 18:10). Each of us have been given “gifts” to help us come to know our Creator, Jesus Christ, who knows what we really look like. "The Lord seeth not as man seeth; for man looketh on the outward appearance, but the Lord looketh on the heart" (1 Samuel 16:7).

It is destructive to us when we focus on the outward appearance and become "[preoccupied] with self and [have] a fixation on the physical, this is more than social insanity; it is spiritually destructive, and it accounts for much of the unhappiness women, including young women, face in the modern world. And if adults are preoccupied with appearance-tucking and nipping and implanting and remodeling everything that can be remodeled- those pressures and anxieties will certainly seep through to children" (Elder Jeffrey R. Holland). We must be careful where we focus our attention. Our children pick up on what we worry about whether it is our looks, our likes and dislikes, our health, or even our hearts. Christ came to help us with all of it, but our heart is what we can decide whether or not we want to change and will have an eternal effect upon us, not just physically, but spiritually. Christ is there, waiting to help us with this change. "They that be whole need not a physician, but they that are sick. ....I will have mercy, and not sacrifice: for I am not come to call the righteous, but sinners to repentance" (Matthew 9:12-13). We all need  the Physician because we all sin and make mistakes and none of us have a "magazine body". Christ is the Physician and our hearts are healed as we turn/return to Him and He helps us see the true value, the "worth" of our entire selves, not just how we look to the world. We don't need to suffer unnecessarily. "[Christ] suffered the pain of all men, that all men might repent and come unto Him" (D&C 18:11).When we focus on physical impairments, such as my scars, I am suffering unnecessarily and need to repent, need to turn to Him and see ourselves for who we really are. We are more than our bodies, even though the world would have us believe otherwise. "...Ye are the temple of God, and that the Spirit of God dwelleth in you" (1 Corinthians 3:16)!

He knows what we suffer physically as well as spiritually because He suffered for everyone. He wants us to know who we are, that is part of why we have physical challenges, some being greater than others. Some challenges can be as simple as growing older and dealing with wrinkles, grey hair, missing teeth, weight and and eye sight changes. Others can be quite severe such as cancer, Muscular Dystrophy, diabetes, mental illness, learning disabilities, to name just a few.  I have wondered at times why I must go through things and why a miracle can't take place and have the "scars" taken away. (I was told the other day that my acne scars could be removed, which I knew could be done, but I don't notice them. They don't inhibit my life, because I am not my scars. I am not defined by my scars.) I have come to know for myself that sometimes, " though [we] have all faith, so that [we] could remove mountains" (1 Corinthians 13:2) the mountains aren't suppose to be removed. Sometimes, we must be as Caleb in the Old Testament and say, "Give me the mountain" (Joshua 14:12) and climb up it faithfully, trusting that the Lord's plan for us to age, to have these physical challenges, are for a reason, most often to help us "come to ourselves" (see Luke 15:17). He wants us to know our "worth", because He already knows how "precious" we are (see Isaiah 43:4).

He wants us to know who we really are and this comes from "looking up [to God], having the image of God engraven upon [our] countenances" (Alma 1:27) as we put Him first in our lives rather than worrying about every wrinkle or grey hair or change in our body that is going to come our way. We need to be "neat and comely" (Alma 1:27), comely meaning "pleasing and wholesome in appearance; attractive (The Free Dictionary) and more concerned about having His image in our countenance than we are about the image in the mirror. The way to have His image engraven upon our countenance isn't to take away "the scar", but to trust that He will heal us physically and spiritually through our faith in Him, for all things are spiritual unto Him (see D&C 29:34). Physical challenges are spiritual challenges. If we allow them to be, they are some of the greatest blessings in our lives. I always think of this saying that is on my laundry room wall: "When life is more that you can stand, kneel". I believe this is the proper way to look to God, even if we are in the middle of a crowd and we can only do so mentally. We must "look to God, and live" (Alma 37:47).

In this time when the world would have us think we are "magazine people" rather than "children of God" (see Romans 9:8) we must "be women (and men) of Christ. (We must) cherish [our] esteemed place in the sight of God. He needs [us]" (Elder Jeffrey R. Holland). We can and we must "trust in the Lord with all [our] heart; and lean not unto [our] own understanding. In all [our] ways acknowledge Him, and he shall direct [our] paths" ( Proverbs 3:5-6). He knows whether or not the mountain must be removed or if we will get stronger by climbing it. We don't get stronger by sitting around reading a magazine that tells us we aren't "magazine shape". We can trust the Savior, our Creator, who knows all things (see Mosiah 4:9), that He knew and still knows what is exactly right for us, so that we may know for ourselves who we really are. This is how we must define ourselves, by Him who knows us best, and thus have His image engraven upon your countenance, reflecting who you really are. For we are, this I testify, "children of the Most High" (Psalms 82:6).