"But if not...(Daniel 3:18)

Sometimes things don't go as we plan...I recently had a second shoulder surgery, definitely not planned. I had surgery for a shoulder injury back in April, and the recovery was long and painful. To have a second surgery, for a different injury, just a day before leaving town was not in my plans. Due to insurance and timing, it was needed before we left town. I had a day to organize things for the surgery, be ready for Christmas, and ready to leave town. It isn't life threatening or even long term life changing, but it is a pain (in the shoulder) and has caused me to ponder strong examples of enduring and going forward with faith, even being put into a fiery furnace.

I have to ask, am I even near to what Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego were like? Have I been threatened by a "burning fiery furnace" (Daniel 3:6)? I think there are times when we are all forced to choose between standing up for what is right and being faced with a fiery furnace or perhaps, just being thrown into what seems like a fire of uncontrollable height and heat. I wonder if I am able to respond as they did, "If it be so, our God whom we serve is able to deliver us from the burning fiery furnace, and he will deliver us out of thine hand, O king. But if not, be it known unto thee, O king, that we will not serve thy gods, nor worship the golden image which thou hast set up" (Daniel 3:17-18). The "but if not" is what challenges me to try and stand strong no matter what the outcome is to be, even if the only thing that I can do is to have a positive attitude during a difficult time.

Now, Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego were saved. But that isn't always the case- think of Abinadi (see Mosiah 17:20). Sometimes things don't go the way we plan. Sometimes we are allowed to be "in the furnace of affliction" (Isaiah 48:10), and honestly, I don't like being in that furnace. It is just not where I like to spend my time. But it happens to all of us and no one is exempt. I think the real trial is whether or not we will endure to the end, no matter how hot the fire really is or if we are saved from the fire. It's the "but if not" part that is the real test.

Elder Dennis E.Simmons (former member of the Second Quorum of the Seventy) shared this thought about "but if not": "Our God will deliver us from ridicule and persecution, but if not, ...Our God will deliver us from sickness and disease, but if not, ...He will deliver us from loneliness, depression, or fear, but if not, ...Our God will deliver us from threats accusations, and insecurity, but if not, ...He will deliver us from death and impairment of loved ones, but if not, ...we will trust in the Lord. Our God will see that we receive justice and fairness, but if not, ..." (But If Not...).

This is a lot to ponder. Add your own "but if not". How will you respond if you lose your ability to write, or use a limb, or am limited by your health? How will you respond if you lose a loved one, a child, or get divorced unexpectedly? We all have our "but if not..." moments. God doesn't love one person above another because they go through these afflictions or have none. God "loveth our souls as well as He loveth our children" (see Alma 24:14). God really wants us to be like him (see Matt. 5:48, 3 Nephi 12:48 ) "that we may be purified even as He is pure" (Moroni 7:48). And as a loving Father in Heaven, he lets us endure and go through our own "fiery furnace of affliction" or perhaps we can call them mini Gethsemane's. The Lord says, "Behold, I have refined thee, but not with silver; I have chosen thee in the furnace of affliction" (Isaiah 48:10). Notice, He doesn't say, next to the the furnace, or beside it. He says, "in the furnace of affliction".

You know, this was a major inconvenience to have to go through a second shoulder surgery, especially with the timing of everything, but I do know that all things work together for our good (see D&C 100:15). God loves us! He will help us in all things, even when they don't turn out like we think they should...the "but if not" makes all the difference. This I testify.

Thumbs up- with the nurse and aid who helped me before the "fiery furnace" of shoulder surgery, 2nd one in a year

Yup, that's how I do it, prior to entering "the furnace"

Goofing off with my son after the surgery...(pain medicine is very helpful but only a temporary solution)

"Be ye therefore merciful, as your Father also is merciful" (Luke 6:36)

With all the negative news about the various injustices in the world these days, it has given me great pause to ponder this sad (understatement) state of affairs. I do not wish to make things worse, rather my desire is to suggest a solution to all these problems that seem to permeate our system, not only in the United States, but throughout the world. I am not a naive person who has only lived a life of bliss, but I don't feel I need to share all my "dark secrets" to validate that I have had my share of unfair/unjust experiences. From my own experiences I have learned there is only one solution to all the ills that plague the world. It is simple. It is to receive Christ, for He is the Gift.

Receiving gifts can be hard if we don't think they are going to be of any value to us, don't know how they work, or require a lot of effort to assemble or even think we have no need for them. The Gift of Christ makes all the difference. It has a "more powerful effect upon the minds of the people than the sword, or anything else, which [has] happened to us" (Alma 31:5). I know when I have been wounded by another I have sought and thought about seeking justice. "In scriptural terms, justice is the unchanging law that brings consequences for actions. Because of the law of justice, we receive blessings when we obey God's commandments. The law of justice also demands that a penalty be paid for every sin we commit" (Justice). Sometimes, when the laws of the land don't seem to satisfy the demands of justice we think we have a right to respond in anger and take matters into our own hands. In doing so we are no better than those who have sinned against us.

The powerful part of the Gift is that if I extend mercy, I don't need to fear that justice will not be served. "What, do ye suppose that mercy can rob justice? I say unto you, Nay; not one whit. If so, God would cease to be God" (Alma 42:25). Paul says, "Be not deceived; God is not mocked: for whatsoever a man soweth, that shall he also reap" (Galatians 6:7). When we have lost something or someone we love and cherish, or have been deeply wounded which may seem to be unrepairable, it is hard to remember that God is a just God and we can 100% trust that all will be taken care of. Notice, I said all, not just the small things we seem to manage on our own, but all things.

When we receive a gift and we really appreciate it, we use it. The beauty of the gift of Christ is that we don't have to worry about justice, rather we can spend our energy receiving and extending mercy. "Mercy is the compassionate treatment of a person greater than what is deserved, and it is made possible through the Atonement of Jesus Christ" (Mercy). The beauty of giving mercy is that we may also receive it in kind: "Blessed are the merciful, for they shall obtain mercy" (Matthew 5:7), and we all need mercy. The world would have us seek justice, but the Lord teaches us to extend mercy, "Be ye therefore merciful, as your Father also is merciful" (Luke 6:36). Applying or extending mercy when it is justified by the world to turn your back, hurt, retaliate, or respond in kind or worse, is only made possible through the Atonement and is applying the gift of Christ. Christ wants more for us than justification. He wants us to be sanctified through His healing power, grace, and His sacrifice, even the Atonement (see sanctification; Moses 6:59-60).

I have experienced the need to extend mercy when retribution or retaliation was justified. It was not easy, but it was, and still is worth every effort to be merciful. As we become good receivers we  make it possible to use this gift of healing from Jesus Christ, the Savior of the world, on a daily basis. This Gift will heal the world. This I testify.

Here is a short video for your enjoyment: He is The Gift

Bonus thoughts and links:
Elder Jeffrey R. Holland: "A basic principle of Latter-day Saint doctrine is that we have to know that God is just in order to go forward. One of God's attributes is justice, and we would not have the faith- because of fear- to live righteously or to love better or to repent more readily if somehow we didn't think that justice would count for us, if somehow we thought God would change His mind and decide there was another set of rules. Because we know that God if just and would cease to be God if He weren't so, we have the faith to go forward, knowing that we will not be the victims of whimsy or caprice or a bad day or a bad joke. That assurance is very encouraging." (The Justice and Mercy of God).

Elder Dallin H. Oaks: He Heals the Heavy Laden

"To others it is given to believe on their words" ( D&C 46:14)

Drafting is a wonderful way to ride a bike. It saves energy, shares the burden of riding long distances, enables one to be social and talk with other riders. It is a great way to travel long distances. Every rider has an opportunity to be the leader. But, if you are learning to draft or need to save your strength, you can usually hang out in the middle of the pack and rely on the strength of those in front of you. Now that I ride a trike, I can no longer draft off other riders. On long distant rides I must rely upon my own strength and be okay with being by myself at times. This image of drafting keeps coming to mind as I ponder the responsibility I have as a parent to teach my children the gospel and how to live it.

Watching riders draft in the middle of the pack- Tour of Utah

As a leader in our home I have the responsibility to teach our children truth and where and how to find it (see D&C 68:25). As our children learn for themselves they are welcome to "draft" off my strength and testimony of what I know to be true. At times, we all "draft" off of one another when perhaps our faith and knowledge aren't as strong as we hoped or would like them to be. To believe on the words of others is a spiritual gift. In the Doctrine and Covenants we read: "To others it is given to believe on their words, that they also might have eternal life if they continue faithful" ( D&C 46:14). It is not weakness when we need to rely on the testimony or strength of others, rather we are given a gift to believe on the words of others when we seek help from the Lord. It is a great blessing to be able to lead and guide as others "draft" and we become stronger ourselves. We have a responsibility to share our testimonies and what we know so that those who have this gift to believe with be strengthened. Elder Dallin H. Oaks said it this way: "Where it is given to some to know and to others to believe on their words, those who know must be responsible for sharing their testimonies. Only in this way can they give those who have the gift of believing on their words something to lean upon as they, too, move toward eternal life" (Spiritual Gifts).

As I ponder this drafting, especially now that I ride a trike and wish I could still draft, I realize there is another principle of the gospel that we need to apply at some point in our lives. That is when we become the leader, we become the grown up and need to be responsible for our own choices, actions, direction, and path we choose. When this happens, we can no longer "draft" or blame or point fingers when things go wrong. When I am out there on a really long ride, all alone, I cannot blame my parents for my lack of preparation, or lack or nutrition or water. It is time for me to "perform [my] labors", a time to "prove all things; [and] hold fast to that which is good" (Alma 34:32; 1 Thessalonians 5:21).

Notice the leader at the head of the draft pack

When we become the leader, we get the opportunity to practice what we have been preparing. We are told: "If ye are prepared ye shall not fear" (D&C 38:30). When I have sufficiently prepared for a long ride I find that I have enough strength to endure to the end. I find that I rely upon the Lord when I am alone on these long rides. He is the One I can draft off, always. When I find that I am alone, not only on trike rides, but any time in life, I can seek for that gift "to believe on their words", and I am strengthened by the words of Christ. I have learned to trust in the Lord.

I love this scripture: "Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct thy paths" (Proverbs 3:5-6). This is the way a solo rider can draft, by relying upon the Lord. He will direct our path when we follow His lead (see D&C 78:18). Sometimes, no matter how much I have prepared, I am taken by surprise by weather, hill climbs, flat tires, or other unforeseen events. But I endure because I trust in the Lord. I know that all who "seek this Jesus" will also be able to "perform their labors" (Ether 12:41; Alma 34:32) no matter if they are in the middle, the leader, or a solo rider. This I testify.

Riding solo on a century ride, both of us unable to draft of each other and must rely on our own preparation.

"And upon these I write the things of my soul..." (2 Nephi 4:15)

This being my 200th post I keep thinking about why I write this blog and how I feel about sharing it. "I write the things of my soul" (2 Nephi 4:15) and don't want to be mocked. I have to admit that I have pangs of anxiety every time I go to press the "publish" button. I totally relate to Moroni when he pleads with the Lord about his writing, "[People] will mock at these things, because of our weakness in writing; for Lord thou hast made us mighty in word by faith, but thou hast not made us mighty in writing...when we write we behold our weakness, and stumble because of the placing of our words; and I fear lest the [people] shall mock at our words" (Ether 12:23, 25). I feel exactly the same way- that people will only see my misspelled words, sloppy sentences, or my multiple mistakes. But my desire to share the things that I know to be true with my loved ones, and all of God's children is stronger than the anxiety I feel. So I write.

It gives me courage to write when I read the Lord's reply to Moroni. He says, "Fools mock, but they shall mourn; and my grace is sufficient for the meek, that they shall take no advantage of your weakness" (Ether 12:26). So, if people make fun of what I write, or even choose not to read it due to my clumsiness, I write anyway.

I so love the scriptures! And so I write about them. I find joy, comfort, peace, and guidance in them, for they are the words of Christ (see 2 Nephi 33:10; Colossians 3:16; 2 Nephi 32:3). I have been through some really hard things (everyone goes through hard things) and it is the scriptures (you can read and even watch Bible videos here) that have helped me and given me direction and hope in those hard times. I have learned for myself the truth of these words: "Feast upon the words of Christ; for behold, the words of Christ will tell you all things what ye should do" (2 Nephi 32:3). The scriptures have shown me all things that I need to do. The challenge is to "go and do" (1 Nephi 3:7) for I am not perfect in the application but I keep trying. I write in hopes "...that your joy may be full" (1 John 1:4) as you "go and do" also.

I write for my children and loved ones. This is one of my favorite scriptures. It is the words of Nephi and for me, it says very clearly another reason I write: "And we talk of Christ, we rejoice in Christ, we preach of Christ, we prophesy of Christ, and we write according to our prophecies (prophecies being testimony- see Revelations 19:10), that our children may know to what source they may look for a remission of their sins" (2 Nephi 25:26). I want my children to know that it is through the grace of Jesus Christ that all sin, pain, every affliction, temptations, and death- all of it, is made whole in Him and He will succor us in, through, and during all of it (see Alma 7:11-13) as we turn to Him. And so I write.

I don't believe everyone needs to keep a public journal or blog their thoughts. But we each can write blessings by our daily actions. Elder Carlos E. Asay said, "We do, in fact, write our own blessings by the way we live and serve" (Write Your Own Blessing). I write many of the things I know to be true here. But hopefully, the most powerful writing I will do is my daily living of these truths. I am not perfect at it, but I keep practicing (I'm a practicing Christian after all). "And upon these I write the things of my soul, and many of the scriptures... For my soul delighteth in the scriptures, and my heart pondereth them, and writeth them for the learning and the profit of my children" (2 Nephi 4:15). And this is why I write.

I write that my children may know...

Yes- that these awesome children may know! They are why I write the things of my soul

Now go and write your own blessings. (You're always welcome to share them with me!) Know you are loved!!!

"...look forward unto Christ with steadfastness..." (2 nephi 26:8)

As I look forward at the rapidly approaching Christmas season I realize I make a yearly promise that "this season will be different". I promise myself that I will worry less about shopping, getting stuff, and being places and do more for the people I love. The "do more" would be spend time with my family, and serve my neighbors, be aware of those in need and "lift the hands that hang down and the feeble knees" (Hebrews 12:12) and really give the gift of love the Savior taught to give. I realize that it isn't just a seasonal problem or dilemma. It is a year round challenge to "look forward unto Christ with steadfastness" (2 nephi 26:8) and to continually "seek this Jesus of whom the prophets and apostles have written" (Ether 12:41) and do testify of.

In the Old Testament Lot's wife didn't look forward, but "looked back" (Genesis 19:26). She wanted to return to the former life they had in Sodom and Gomorrah. I seem to have the same problem with my Christmas planning. Procrastination isn't a very good gift for me to be giving on a regular basis, and going on a personal guilt trip doesn't make the Christmas season much of a vacation. It isn't a very relaxed time of the year. Shoving aside all my weaknesses, and wiping the slate clean is a real challenge for me. But, Christ has said and promised, "Learn of me, and listen to my words; walk in the meekness of my Spirit, and you shall have peace in me" (D&C 19:23). Notice, we must learn and listen and walk. He has given us a formula we can follow.

In our day and age people really like science and want proof and evidence. One formula that is guaranteed peace, from "The Prince of Peace" Himself (Isaiah 9:6; 2 Nephi 19:6) is: learn of Christ; listen to His words; walk in the meekness of His Spirit. Christ looked forward. He suffered in Gethsemane "being in an agony...and his sweat was as it were great drops of blood falling down to the ground" (Luke 22:44). He then was taken prisoner and abandoned by his friends (Luke 22:47-62), yet, He looked forward. "They mocked Him, and smote Him" (Luke 22:63-71) which we would now call the worst kind of bullying ever. He was tried unfairly (see Luke 23:13-24), and then, looking forward, He carried his own cross and was then crucified (see Luke 23:26). The wonderful joy is that He did not remain in the grave. The angels stated, "He is not here, but is risen" (Luke 24:6). At His death He looked forward knowing He would rise again (see Mark 16:9; Luke 24:39; 3 Nephi 11:12-15).

Ahead there is great joy! Faith in Christ always leads to joy. I hope to focus this coming Christmas season on Christ, just as President Dieter F. Uchtdorf has said. "[Christmas] should...be a time of looking to the future. Let us look forward. Let us prepare for that blessed day when He will come again. Let us be as wise as those ancients who watched for His coming. As His disciples, let us have in our hearts and minds the words of John: "Even so, come, Lord Jesus" (Seeing Christmas through New Eyes). May we "look forward unto Christ with steadfastness" (2 nephi 26:8) not only in the coming Christmas season, but every day of the year. There is great joy as we look forward with faith in Christ. This I testify.

Our family looking forward to the coming year (taken New Year's Eve 2013). Here's to the coming Christmas season and all that is ahead!