"...willing to...comfort those that stand in need of comfort..." (Mosiah 18:9)

Just a few thoughts on "comfort":

When we get baptized into The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints we make the covenant to be "willing to...comfort those that stand in need of comfort..." (Mosiah 18:9). I feel it's worth asking what does it mean to comfort someone? The definition from Merriam/Webster says, "Comfort: 1) give strength and hope; cheer. 2) to ease the grief or trouble of; console" (comfort).

How are you comforted or what brings you comfort, hope, strength, cheer, or eases your grief or troubles? Frequently I seek comfort and cheer in food, chocolate, and/or sugar. But that is very short-lived because I eat it too fast, but boy it tastes good! I experience comfort in feeling safe and secure, in feeling loved and cared for- I find this comfort at home with my family, with friends, and spending time with my loved ones. I also find great comfort in studying and pondering the words of Christ in the scriptures. In doing so, I hear Him (Mark9:7; 3 Nephi 11:7; Joseph Smith History 1:17; see also Hear Him) and I often feel comforted even when my challenges do not dissipate. I ask "what brings you comfort" because when we can identify what brings us comfort, it is often the same ways in which others find or will experience comfort. Thus, you can find simple ways to "comfort, offering strength, cheer, ease the grief or trouble, or console" another simply by sharing what you know will bring you comfort. 

I love the plea of Alma the younger to the Lord for comfort:

"O Lord, my heart is exceedingly sorrowful; wilt thou comfort my soul in Christ. O Lord, wilt thou grant unto me that I may have strength, that I may suffer with patience these afflictions which shall come upon me, because of the iniquity of this people. O Lord, wilt thou comfort my soul, and give unto me success, and also my fellow laborers who are with me-...yea, even all these wilt thou comfort, O Lord. Yea, wilt thou comfort their souls in Christ" (Alma 31:31-32 italics added).

He is pleading that his soul may be comforted in Christ. I believe Alma is expressing what will bring him comfort, which is strength, and to "suffer with patience" his afflictions. Think about what it means to you to have your soul comforted in Christ. How does Christ comfort your soul? I find great comfort in the promises of peace and rest that Christ offers us again and again (see Matthew 11:28-30; John 14:27; John 16:33; D&C 19:23; Alma 58:11; see also Peace of God).

Another verse that touched my heart was when Alma (the father of Alma the younger), receives a reply from the Lord after pleading for the welfare of his people.

"The voice of the Lord came to them in their afflictions, saying: Lift up your heads and be of good comfort, for I know of the covenant which ye have made unto me; and I will covenant with my people and deliver them out of bondage" (Mosiah 24:13 italics added). 

Good comfort...I believe when I trust the Lord and trust my covenants, I receive "good comfort". God keeps His covenants, and He will help us keep ours. The truth that I can repent again and again, that I get to keep trying over and over brings me good comfort. Another "good comfort" is the plan of happiness also called the plan of salvation, the plan of redemption, the merciful plan, or the plan of God (you can search all of those here.)  

 

Please notice, Alma and his people do not receive an immediate release from captivity, but the Lord does "ease the burdens which are put upon [their] shoulders, that even [they] cannot feel them upon [their] backs, even while [they] are in bondage..." (Mosiah 24:14). Think about the comfort that comes as we are given the strength to endure the challenges of life. The comfort of the Holy Ghost, which is called, The Comforter (John 14:26-27). The ability to endure the challenges of life is good comfort!

Our Father in Heaven does the same for each of us when we are in "bondage" or suffering. He is the "God of all comfort" (2 Corinthians 1:3). He comforts us by giving us the strength to endure the things we cannot carry on our own (see Job 12:13,16,21). He comforts us by giving us hope when there seems to be little to no hope (see Psalm 130:5,7). He comforts as we exercise faith in Him as He said, "Be of good cheer; I have overcome the world" (see John 16:33).

I know God blesses us and helps us as we comfort those that stand in need of comfort. As Elder Eyring said, we "Lighten the loads of those best by helping the Lord strengthen them" (The Comforter). I have found that when I strengthen and comfort others I am also strengthened and receive comfort. I know He will help us as we serve and care for one another, even cheer, and comfort by small and simple acts of kindness and love. 

I receive comfort when I spend time with loved ones

I receive comfort when I spend time in nature

Remember, You are SO loved!

"...Always Remember Him" (D&C 20:77,79)

Me and my nephew James, who is loved and missed!

Death. It's so final. It's difficult to describe the suffering that comes when a loved one dies. Especially when they die unexpectedly.

I have always been afraid of the pain that accompanies the death of a loved one. Grief is such a heavy burden to bear, even more so when I am alone. When I only focus on the loss, the separation that death brings with it, the cross of grief is unbearable.

When Jesus' dear friend Lazarus had died, Lazarus' sister, Martha, said to Him, "Lord, if thou hadst been here, my brother had not died". Jesus first tries to comfort her by saying, "Thy brother shall rise again". I love that Martha responds by sharing her faith and belief with Jesus, "I know that he shall rise again in the resurrection at the last day." (John 11). I too know this, that I shall see my loved ones again at the resurrection. But I feel overwhelming grief at this separation that came so unexpectedly.

As the conversation continues between Jesus and Martha, He also testifies of His power and light. "I am the resurrection, and the life: he that believeth in me, though he were dead, yet shall he live: And whosoever liveth and believeth in me shall never die." (John 11:25)

When death comes to a loved one, faith is tried and tested. Grief clouds my thoughts and makes my heart heavy. I have a difficult time seeing through the darkness that has accompanied this death.

Christ asks, "Believest though this?" I must ask myself, do I believe Christ? Do I believe that death is not the end? Do I believe that those who live and believe in Christ "never die"? Death is a great test of faith for all of us.

As Jesus goes with Mary and Martha to the tomb of Lazarus a crowd follows. What is the Savior's response? Does He say, "I have this covered. Don't cry. Don't mourn"? No. He cares for them as a dear friend would care.

Jesus wept. (John 11:35)

"Jesus wept" (John 11:35).

He felt their loss. He felt their grief. He had compassion for them. He cried with them.

If I focus on grief, I cannot bear this cross of pain and suffering (see Be Still, My Soul). It is too painful. It is too heavy (Matthew 11:28).

I am not alone in my grief. And I want to bear it well (see 2 Nephi 9:18). How can I do this? How can I get through this loss of life, the loss of all the memories that will not be...

I force my focus to shift from grief to hope in the Savior.

I practice focusing on Jesus Christ by looking to the "light which shineth," which gives me and you light (D&C 88:11). The light is that death is not the end. The light is the small blessings of comfort extended by friends, loved ones, and even more, the love God has for all of us.

As I focus on Christ I can see! I am able to endure the darkness of death and loss of life. My burden is made lighter (in weight and in brightness).

I can bear this cross as I stay focused on the Savior. He saves me from being lost in grief.

The Resurrected Christ, by Wilson J. Ong 

Jesus Christ is the resurrection (Helaman 14:15-17), it's in Him that I can live, I can endure (see Philippians 4:13) and have hope (see 1 Thessalonians 1:3).

It's through Christ, and because of Christ that I can endure all things (see Philippians 4:13), even the unexpected death of a loved one.

Every week I covenant to "always remember Him" (Moroni 4-5; see also D&C 20:77, 79). I am learning to do this more.

I am becoming better at remembering, as I bear my cross of grief and pain (see Be Still, My Soul).

"...bear one another's burdens..." (Mosiah 18:8)

*Editors note: I wrote this shortly after my mom passed away. I'm ready to share it now.

I have been kind of a bad driver this week. Not intentionally by any means. But mostly because I have been distracted. As I have been driving I have been thinking about my mom. She passed away 3 days ago.

As I pulled into a parking spot today, I could hear my sweet mother's voice say, "Good job! How did you learn to do that so well?" I chuckle at it now. I didn't understand then why she would say that, but now that she is gone, I think I understand a little more. She was trying to look for the good in what I was doing...even if it was complimenting me on my parking job.

I have pondered driving and being distracted and it has brought me to a scripture:

 "...And now, as ye are desirous to come into the fold of God, and to be called His people, and are willing to bear one another's burdens, that they may be light; yea, and are willing to mourn with those that mourn; yea, and comfort those that stand in need of comfort..." (Mosiah 18:8-9). 

What does driving have to do with bearing one another's burdens, even making them lighter? or mourning with others? or comforting others? Well, sometimes I also get upset at other people who I deem to be "bad drivers". But, maybe..., they aren't trying to be a bad driver. Maybe their mother just passed away, too. Or maybe they are just having a really bad day. I think that we can make another's burden lighter just by being a little more patient with them. I believe we could all use a little more patience...I know it makes my burden lighter.

The day of my mom's service

This whole funeral experience is kind of difficult- making arrangements, communicating, and trying to do what seems good for everyone...all while mourning the loss of my mother. One of the really difficult part comes when others tell me that their way is better. Or they continually ask, "Why are you doing this and not that"? or "Why in the world did you choose to have so-and-so do that?" I tell you, I sometimes want to just scream, "I'm trying to do the best I can!" But then I realize that maybe they have also lost their mother recently. And so I can help bear and make their burden lighter by being a good listener, forgiving them quickly, by being patient with them. And even forgiving myself!

My mother's compliment on my parking has reminded me to say, "Thank you for your help", and to look for the good in the simple acts of service others give me and my family. I know that God helps us as we seek to mourn with and comfort each other. Families are definitely the best place for us to practice forgiveness, being patient, and being kind. But I think driving is a pretty close second when it comes to practice time. These simple acts are one way we can make another's burden light and mourn with them. They can also give great comfort. I know it has for me.

"And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus" (Philippians 4:7).

Without going into any details, let me just say that this week has been more than I have been able to comprehend in a lot of ways. Yes, it has been a trial, a burden if you will. Yet, I have felt that my burden has been made lighter by so many kind, good, humble, diligent, faith-filled people . I know that God has heard my supplication, even my request for help from Him (see supplication).  To me, I know that God has sent angels to lift my burden and make it lighter (see Mosiah 18:8), most of whom have no idea they have even done this lifting.

I love these verses: "Be careful for nothing; but in every thing by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God. And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus" (Philippians 4:6-7).

One of the reasons I love this is it reminds me to not worry and "don't be unduly concerned about anything" (Phil. 4:6a). I'm working on not letting my runaway thinking of the "what if's" take over; but rather to "meditate upon these things;  [to] give [myself] wholly to them; that [my] profiting may appear to all" (1 Tim. 4:15). Meditating and pondering on the things of God helps me to calm my heart, clear my mind of fear, and focus on His power to guide and comfort me (see ponder). Meditation is a gift of calm and quieting the heart. I highly recommend it.

Another reason I love this verse is because of the advice to pray and supplicate the Lord with thanksgiving. Offering thanks has been a great blessing to me, especially in times it seems when all I see is "through a glass darkly" (1 Corinthians 13:12). Praying with thanksgiving is very humbling when I am in what seems to be a dark abyss. It helps me see the truth and reality that I am in a world filled with light and peace (see Luke 1:79). Giving thanks is a reminder that indeed, "I have been given much" and therefore, "much is required" (D&C 82:3; see also Luke 12:48).

I can testify of the truth of the words, "The peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus." When I petition, and supplicate the Lord for His help, I must be open to receive this gift, "even peace in this world" (D&C 59:23). His peace does pass all understanding as I keep my focus on Christ, letting go of fear, and trusting Him that all things shall work together for my good (see D&C 98:3; D&C 100:15; Romans 8:28). It's not easy. But it's the "good way" of going through the tough stuff  "therein, and ye shall find rest unto your souls" (Jeremiah 6:16). This I testify. 

Christ makes it possible for me to see through the dark, for light is always brighter.