"...Always Remember Him" (D&C 20:77,79)

Me and my nephew James, who is loved and missed!

Death. It's so final. It's difficult to describe the suffering that comes when a loved one dies. Especially when they die unexpectedly.

I have always been afraid of the pain that accompanies the death of a loved one. Grief is such a heavy burden to bear, even more so when I am alone. When I only focus on the loss, the separation that death brings with it, the cross of grief is unbearable.

When Jesus' dear friend Lazarus had died, Lazarus' sister, Martha, said to Him, "Lord, if thou hadst been here, my brother had not died". Jesus first tries to comfort her by saying, "Thy brother shall rise again". I love that Martha responds by sharing her faith and belief with Jesus, "I know that he shall rise again in the resurrection at the last day." (John 11). I too know this, that I shall see my loved ones again at the resurrection. But I feel overwhelming grief at this separation that came so unexpectedly.

As the conversation continues between Jesus and Martha, He also testifies of His power and light. "I am the resurrection, and the life: he that believeth in me, though he were dead, yet shall he live: And whosoever liveth and believeth in me shall never die." (John 11:25)

When death comes to a loved one, faith is tried and tested. Grief clouds my thoughts and makes my heart heavy. I have a difficult time seeing through the darkness that has accompanied this death.

Christ asks, "Believest though this?" I must ask myself, do I believe Christ? Do I believe that death is not the end? Do I believe that those who live and believe in Christ "never die"? Death is a great test of faith for all of us.

As Jesus goes with Mary and Martha to the tomb of Lazarus a crowd follows. What is the Savior's response? Does He say, "I have this covered. Don't cry. Don't mourn"? No. He cares for them as a dear friend would care.

Jesus wept. (John 11:35)

"Jesus wept" (John 11:35).

He felt their loss. He felt their grief. He had compassion for them. He cried with them.

If I focus on grief, I cannot bear this cross of pain and suffering (see Be Still, My Soul). It is too painful. It is too heavy (Matthew 11:28).

I am not alone in my grief. And I want to bear it well (see 2 Nephi 9:18). How can I do this? How can I get through this loss of life, the loss of all the memories that will not be...

I force my focus to shift from grief to hope in the Savior.

I practice focusing on Jesus Christ by looking to the "light which shineth," which gives me and you light (D&C 88:11). The light is that death is not the end. The light is the small blessings of comfort extended by friends, loved ones, and even more, the love God has for all of us.

As I focus on Christ I can see! I am able to endure the darkness of death and loss of life. My burden is made lighter (in weight and in brightness).

I can bear this cross as I stay focused on the Savior. He saves me from being lost in grief.

The Resurrected Christ, by Wilson J. Ong 

Jesus Christ is the resurrection (Helaman 14:15-17), it's in Him that I can live, I can endure (see Philippians 4:13) and have hope (see 1 Thessalonians 1:3).

It's through Christ, and because of Christ that I can endure all things (see Philippians 4:13), even the unexpected death of a loved one.

Every week I covenant to "always remember Him" (Moroni 4-5; see also D&C 20:77, 79). I am learning to do this more.

I am becoming better at remembering, as I bear my cross of grief and pain (see Be Still, My Soul).

"...thou hast done this with such unwearyingness..." (Helaman 10:5)

I just want to point out a cool word I came across in the Book of Mormon. Unwearyingness. The definition for weary is "exhausted in strength, endurance, vigor, or freshness" (Merriam-Webster). So, to be unweary is to have strength and endurance- to be able to continue forward without tiring. Another way to describe being unweary is to be dedicated and committed to what you are doing.

Nephi is described as being unweary. As you read these verses, I invite you to personalize it, asking the Lord to reveal to you what you have done "with unwearyingness".  Or perhaps ask what you might do "with unwearyingness":

"Blessed art thou, [insert your name], for those things which thou hast done; for I have beheld how thou hast with unwearyingness declared the word, which I have given unto thee, unto this people. And thou hast not feared them, and hast not sought thine own life, but hast sought my will, and to keep my commandments. And now, because thou hast done this with such unwearyingness, behold, I will bless thee forever; and I will make thee mighty in word and in deed, in faith and in works; yea, even that all things shall be done unto thee according to thy word, for thou shalt not ask that which is contrary to my will" (Helaman 10:4-5). 

Here is a summary of what Nephi did with unwearyingness:
- declared the word, which was given him from God, to the people
- did not fear the people
- did not seek his own life (sometimes we have to give up the life we think we are "supposed to have", which can then free up the way for God to give us the life He is preparing for us, even eternal life)
- he kept the commandments of God

Here is a brief summary of the blessings Nephi received because of his unwearyingness:
- blessed forever
- made mighty in word
- made mighty in faith
- made mighty in works
- all things should be done unto Nephi according to God's word. In other words, anything Nephi asks of God will be done because Nephi would not ask anything that would be contrary to the will of God.

Life is not always perfect. Often, it is filled with adversity, trials, pain and suffering. But these experiences need not stall us or make us weary in well doing (see Galatians 6:9). Rather, God wants a powerful people (see Sheri Dew's talk about this). God gives us the strength to do all things (Philippians 4:13) and He provides a way for us to do all things that we are commanded to do (see 1 Nephi 3:7). I know God will bless you and guide you as you seek the spiritual gift of unwearyingness. This I testify.

This is a video of the Tabernacle singing: If the Way Be Full of Trial, Weary Not

These are the words for the chorus:

"Do not weary by the way,

Whatever be thy lot;

There awaits a brighter day,

To all, to all who weary not."

"...by labouring with all the might of his body and the faculty of his whole soul, ... did once more establish peace in the land" (Words of Mormon 1:18)

As thoughts of soul expanding experiences have been on my mind, the words of this scripture took on new meaning for me. "Wherefore, with the help of these [holy men], king Benjamin, by labouring with all the might of his body and the faculty of his whole soul, and also the prophets, did once more establish peace in the land" (Words of Mormon 1:18).

As a mother, I have been given the help of  holy men and women, such as sisters, brothers, friends, leaders, parents, grandparents, teachers, bishops, and so many more people to help me establish peace. I have labored "with all the might of [my] body and the faculty of [my] whole soul..." to establish peace in our home. Think about these words, faculty of the whole soul. It's with the entirety of our souls that we do all we can to help lift and strengthen the family of God.

As a parent, I do use "all the might of my body" to help my family be united and strengthened in God's love. I do know what true peace, even the "peace of God, which passeth all understanding" (Philippians 4:7), feels like and I want my children to feel it, too. I don't know of any parent that doesn't seek and strive to maintain peace in their homes.

And then the words: "...faculty of  his whole soul..." (Words of Mormon 1:18). This phrase caught my attention. Faculty means: "1) an ability, natural or acquired, for a particular kind of action: a faculty for making friends easily. 2) one of the powers of the mind, as memory, reason, or speech: Though very sick, he is in full possession of all his faculties. 3) an inherent capability of the body: the faculties of sight and hearing. 4) exceptional ability or aptitude: a president with a faculty for management."
Nephi said this about "faculty": 

• "Wherefore, I, Nephi, did exhort them to give heed unto the word of the Lord; yea, I did exhort them with all the energies of my soul, and with all the faculty which I possessed, that they would give heed to the word of God and remember to keep his commandments always in all things" (1 Nephi 15:25).

  To me, this sounds very much like the soul expanding experience of a mother trying to teach her children to learn of God, to put their trust in God. It's the soul expanding experience that comes as I teach my children to repent and keep the commandments because they love God more than the fear of not knowing everything.  I know this, because I do believe I use all the faculties I possess, even those of love, of patience, of hearing the still small voice of the Spirit...I use every single faculty so that my "children may know to what source they may look for a remission of their sins" (2 Nephi 25:26). 
• • 
    
  • I can tell you that every day is worth the effort. Every day, all the small things, they do add up and make "great things come to pass" (Alma 37:6). I'm writing this for myself, because I find it too easy to forget that all those small things do make all the difference. All of my efforts, using all my faculties, and all my might, is soul expanding- not just their souls, but my soul as well. Keep up the "Great Work" (Alma 26:3, D&C 64:33)! It's totally worth all the effort. This I testify.
    

    

    The small things in life add up and truly expand my soul.

"I can do all things through Christ which stengtheneth me" (Philippians 4:13)

This morning started out rough. My foot hasn't been so kind when I wake up lately (info about my foot can be read here). I started to feel sorry for myself. (not a great idea- I don't recommend it). So, I had to change my thinking. I put on some music that had lifted my spirits in the past (Scripture Lullabies). It did the same for me this time. The scriptures and the words of Christ filled me and comforted me. It is really powerful what pondering and thinking about the words of Christ does. It changes my heart. It cheers me up. It lifts me and comforts me. Here are just a few words that have really made a difference for me.

"Therefore, let your hearts be comforted concerning Zion; for all flesh is in mine hands; be still and know that I am God" (D&C 101:16 see also Psalms 46:10). The words: "be still and know that I am God" are powerful. To be still is to be calm, subdued, free from commotion, peaceful. I love taking time each day to "be still". Sometimes, it is just a moment, but that stillness fills me with His peace. And as it does, I am able to keep trying, keep loving, and I trust God- that everything will work out.

Which leads me to the next words: "Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding" (Proverbs 3:5). "Trust in the Lord" is setting aside my worry and then knowing that everything works out for the good (see D&C 90:24; Romans 8:28). I can't focus on whether or not this is a permanent condition or if I will be able to ever hike or bike again. I must set it aside, let that worry go and trust in the Lord. When I do this, that's when the pain leaves me and I can go about my day (even if it is only walking to the couch on a bad day).

And the next words are: "I can do all things through Christ which stengtheneth me" (Philippians 4:13). When I focus on the power given to me through Christ, I am strengthened in so many ways. I have courage to endure. I have the strength to serve in small ways, and be grateful that I can. I am able to have the strength to change and grow in ways I hadn't thought possible. It's pretty awesome when I have the strength to do all things because of Christ. For me, "all things" is not always what man thinks is important. "All things" has a very different meaning than what the world would think. How have you been strengthened?

The last words I will share today are: "...Go and do..." (1 Nephi 3:7). I find these to be such important words. Sometimes I am feeling so sorry for myself that I don't go and do those things that will help me get stronger physically and spiritually. But to "go and do the things which the Lord hath commanded" becomes easy when I put my trust in Him and know that in Him, I can do all things. And part of doing all things is the going part. GO. Go and do good. It feels so good. This I testify.

The other day I got to spend time with my son waiting at the doctors office. Love this boy!

I love that he will be goofy with me and is so kind and patient with me.

I got to make a flourless chocolate cake...now that was one delicious cake...chocolate pretty much always helps (haha).