"I am the light of the world: he that followeth me shall not walk in darkness, but shall have the light of life" (John 8:12)

Okay, I love sugar cookies with frosting that is almost as thick as the cookie. I can usually find these kind of cookies at the store. I could eat about a bazillion of them in one sitting. Well, maybe not a bazillion, but I do eat a lot of them. They are filled with sugar (it's the first ingredient) and bleached white flour, and fat. They are so enticing, looking so pretty with sprinkles on top and have absolutely no substance. But I sure think they taste good, until I eat too many of them. What does eating super fattening cookies have to do with Jesus Christ you may ask? or living the gospel? Well, actually, a lot. Let me explain.

Adam and Eve were created "...and the Lord God commanded the man, saying, Of every tree of the garden thou mayest freely eat: But of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, thou shalt not eat of it: for in the day that thou eatest thereof thou shalt surely die" (Genesis 2:16-17). Eating cookies isn't going to make me die, but it does make me think about what is good. It is my choice to "partake" or not. Just as it was for Adam and Eve to partake or not to partake of the tree of knowledge. This was the plan, for Adam and Eve to have a choice as to whether or not they would partake of the fruit. "...even the forbidden fruit in opposition to the tree of life; the one being sweet and the other bitter. Wherefore, the Lord God gave unto man that he should act for himself. Wherefore, man could not act for himself save it should be that he was enticed by the one or the other" (2 Nephi 2:15-16 italics added). Every day we are "enticed" by something, whether for good or bad. The beauty of the whole things is that we get to choose what we want to "eat", whether or not we will be enticed, or yield to those enticings.

Being enticed, what exactly does this mean? Enticed means: "to attract artfully or adroitly or by arousing hope or desire: tempt" (Merriam-Webster). Being enticed is a good thing because "...man could not act for himself save it should be that he was enticed by the one or the other" (2 Nephi 2:16). The Lord Himself said, "And it must needs be that the devil should tempt the children of men, or they could not be agents unto themselves; for if they never should have bitter they could not know the sweet- Wherefore, it came to pass that the devil tempted Adam, and he partook of the forbidden fruit and transgressed the commandment, wherein he became subject to the will of the devil, because he yielded unto temptation" (D&C 39-40). It is through this process of being enticed that we are able to learn for ourselves what is good and what is bitter (see Moses 6:55), or what is "light" and what is "dark". We get to choose whether or not we want to follow the Light or the dark (see John 8:12). We must be careful to not call dark light, or light dark. We are warned: "Woe unto them that call evil good, and good evil; that put darkness for light, and light for darkness; that put bitter for sweet, and sweet for bitter" (Isaiah 5:20)!

When we have experienced "light" or "tasted this light" (Alma 32:35) there is a difference in the way we can see, behave, think,  and act. Light lets us see, be, think, act good, because "whatsoever is light, is good" (Alma 32:35). Think about when you have been in a room and the lights are brightened ever so slightly. You might notice it at first, but when your eyes adjust, you don't really notice. But, turn the lights out, you are in the dark. Then you really notice the marked difference between the light and the dark. When the lights come back on, you think it is very bright. The Lord has blessed us to be able to discern between good and bitter a little at a time, "line upon line, precept upon precept, here a little and there a little" (2 Nephi 28:30) so that we aren't blinded by the light and close our eyes to all truth, for "truth is light" (D&C 84:45). If we eat all the cookies, all at once, we get sick. They wouldn't taste so good. Truth is taught a bite at a time, or a "light" at a time. "Thy word is a lamp unto my feet, and a light unto my path" (Psalms 119:105). The words of the Lord, or the scriptures are little lights, or cookies if you will, that lead us in our path to Him. They illuminate our way as we read, study, act, follow, as we "taste this light" (Alma 32:35). They will lead us to Jesus Christ.

Jesus Christ said, "I am the light of the world: he that followeth me shall not walk in darkness, but shall have the light of life" (John 8:12). With these words of hope, He was desiring to entice us to follow Him and walk in light and walk in truth. There will be people we come in contact with the won't be able to discern light, or even be enticed by it, even when it is right before them (see John 8:13). But that isn't our worry or concern. We can choose to "press forward, with a steadfastness in Christ, having a perfect brightness of hope, and a love of God and of all men" (2 Nephi 31:20). We get to choose to be enticed and "taste the light", those wonderful, delicious "cookies" that will fill us up and always make us feel good.

"...Clothe [our]selves with the bond of charity, as with a mantle, which is the bond of perfectness and peace" (D&C 88:125)

Thoughts have been rambling around my brain like stones in glass, breaking off little parts here and there. I start to write and fragments come forth, but nothing comes together. I feel like I have days like this. A lot. Fragmented days. Some of it comes from pain, others just from being disorganized. And other fragments...just come. But fragments, when put together make a whole piece. Fragments suggest bits and pieces. To me, bits and pieces can be blessings that reflect light off the broken glass and give new insight to where there was none before. I love receiving a "fresh view about God, about oneself, and about the world" (Bible Dictionary, Repentance). Too much light, when I have one of those killer headaches, can make things worse. A fragment of light is sometimes sufficient to get me through the day, leading to where I need to be, eventually making it possible for me to complete all the ramblings and make a whole piece. I have come to conclude that fragments aren't all bad, they can be good and used to lift us and guide us.

Jesus Christ fed many hungry people (see John 6:5-14; Mark 6:32-44; Matthew 14:13-21) Each time He instructed His disciples to "...gather up the fragments that remain, that nothing be lost" (John 6:12). There was to be no waste. The Lord doesn't want us to waste what He gives us, leaving fragments behind that can change our lives, those little morsels of light and truth. One "fragment" that I learned about today was this simple truth. Sometimes we think we need to "steady the ark of God" (D&C 85:8) "when the oxen [have] stumbled" (2 Samuel 6:6-7), meaning that we think we need to make things right because 'so and so' isn't doing things how they are 'suppose' to do them. So, we are going to enforce them and "steady the ark". When in reality, God doesn't need help steadying the ark. God knows exactly what is going on with the Church. He knows exactly what is going on with the "crazy" Sunday School class, the bishop that may seem too busy for us, much less the prophet who we may have an issue with. President David O. McKay said: "It is a little dangerous for us to go out of our own sphere and try unauthoritatively to direct the efforts of a brother. You remember the case of Uzzah who stretched forth his hand to steady the ark [see 1 Chronicles 13:7–10]. He seemed justified when the oxen stumbled in putting forth his hand to steady that symbol of the covenant. We today think his punishment was very severe. Be that as it may, the incident conveys a lesson of life. Let us look around us and see how quickly men who attempt unauthoritatively to steady the ark die spiritually. Their souls become embittered, their minds distorted, their judgement faulty, and their spirit depressed. Such is the pitiable condition of men who, neglecting their own responsibilities, spend their time in finding fault with others" (In Conference Report, Apr. 1936, pg. 60).

From this fragment I was led to another fragment of "light and truth" (D&C 93:36). Rather than spending time trying to "steady the ark" that needs no steadying, I can spend time helping to carry something else. It is really simple, "Bear ye one another's burdens, and so fulfil the law of Christ" (Galatians 6:2). When we are helping to lift another's burdens we have no time to criticize or find fault. Rather we are filled with charity. When we "clothe [our]selves with the bond of charity, as with a mantle, which is the bond of perfectness and peace" (D&C 88:125), darkness leaves, peace comes and more light and truth fill us up. We become changed as we help our fellowman, being more alive spiritually. This is exactly what we want to happen. We become "converted unto the Lord" (Alma 23:6).

Fragments of light help us to draw closer to Christ and become converted to Him (see 3 Nephi 28:23). He will "give unto the children of men line upon line, precept upon precept, here a little and there a little; and blessed are those who hearken unto [His] precepts, and lend and ear unto  [His] counsel, for they shall learn wisdom; for unto him that receiveth [He] will give more..." (2 Nephi 28:30). Let us receive the those bits of light, even the Light of Jesus Christ, especially if our days seem a little fragmented. This I testify.

"...for we know that it is by grace that we are saved, after all we can do". (2 Nephi 25:23)

Some days are just better than others. And some days you wake up with a kink in your neck, you lose your wedding ring, one of your sweet children refuses to do what is asked and totally freaks out on you, your garage door breaks and you can't get your car out of the garage, your dryer doesn't dry the clothes...I could go on, but you get the idea. Gratefully, "...it is by grace that we are saved, after all we can do" (2 Nephi 25:23) because each day our best is different, but we still try to do our best.

God didn't send us here to return to Him the same or worse than we left Him. He sent us here to become something more through obedience to His commandments (see Exodus 16:4; Abraham 3:25). The awesome thing is that we are "agents unto [our]selves", (Moses 6:56) meaning, we are in charge of how we behave, think, and act. So, on our other than better days, and every day for that matter, we can decide how we are going to act or react to the situation at hand. The beauty is that we are told what we need to know and how to behave: "...add to your faith virtue; and to virtue knowledge; and to knowledge temperance; and to temperance patience; and to patience godliness; and to godliness brotherly kindness; and to brotherly kindness charity. For if these things be in you, and abound, they make you that ye shall neither be barren nor unfruitful in the knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ" (2 Peter 1:5-8). If these are in us then we will have knowledge of our Savior, and as we come to know Him better, we are becoming more than we were when we left our heavenly home at birth.

Every day is different, and therefore, every day brings a different "best" or a different "all we can do" (2 Nephi 25:23). That is one reason why we need and have grace. Grace is "divine means of help or strength, given through the bounteous mercy and love of Jesus Christ" (Bible Dictionary). Just as we learn about Jesus Christ a little at a time, and learn "line upon line...here a little and there a little" (2 Nephi 28:30) we also receive "grace for grace" (John 1:16; see also D&C 93:12, 20)."The phrase 'grace for grace' suggests an exchange. For example, as we seek to serve others, repent, and do other good works, the Lord gives us spiritual strength and power to improve in exchange for our efforts. 'Grace for grace' also implies a developmental process." For each grace (or divine means of help and/or strength) we receive and worthily use, we receive another grace (or divine means of help and/or strength) in our progress toward perfection" (B.O.M. Teacher Manuel). We grow stronger as we seek the Lord's help and try to become like Him, as He has asked us to "be ye holy" (see 1 Peter 1:16). We can do this because "with God nothing shall be impossible" (Luke 1:37)!

What a blessing that each day is different and we get to experience (see D&C 105:10) for ourselves "to know good from evil" (Moses 6:56). We become more than what we thought we could be through the challenges of each day as we do our best, and let Him do the rest.This I testify.

P.S. I found my wedding ring!

"(For we walk by faith, not by sight:)" (2 Corinthians 5:7)

I am what I would call a boot girl. I like boots. I have more than one pair, I have several (several being more than 7 or 8...that's a lot of boots)! I get most, if not all of them on sale. I like the way they feel and the way they look, for whatever reason. But there is one pair in particular, the pair I have had the longest, that are very special to me. They all have a story, but this pair in particular is different. I'll tell you about these boots.

The short story is, when I started really liking my husband, Jeff, and realizing that I had feelings for him, and he was shorter than I was, I was concerned. I didn't want to be like a guy who had told me that I was "too tall." Here I was, dating the most awesome man, brilliant, funny, kind, spiritual, honest, and shorter than I was. After some serious soul searching I came to the conclusion that I knew I really liked Jeff. And if the only reason I had to not like him was because he was shorter than I was, and if I had to stand before the Lord and say, "I didn't marry Jeff because he was shorter than I am", then the problem was mine, not Jeff's. Once I realized this, I was okay with how tall Jeff was. He was perfect, and no matter what happened with the relationship, I was going to have fun and enjoy liking him. So, I went out and bought me a pair of boots that made me two inches taller. I was free to walk and see what the Lord was offering me with this incredible man. These boots are a symbol of faith to me. They represent that I trusted in the Lord's perspective more than mine.

Sometimes we are so trapped by what we see and know, that we think that's all there is and we forget the Lord is omniscient and we stop walking. He wants us to "walk by faith, not by sight" (2 Corinthians 5:7). If I had only seen Jeff's height, I would have missed all his other incredible qualities. Christ offers us so much through the gospel and sometimes, because we hear of something that doesn't "fit" or it doesn't go with all we have learned all our life, we panic and think "this can't be true" and walk away from it. When we "walk by faith" we put on our "boots of faith" and say, "Lord, I will follow thee withersoever thou goest" (Luke 9:57). By putting on the "boots of faith" we are saying in essence, we trust the Lord and we aren't going to "lean" on our own understanding (see Proverbs 3:5). There is one thing I have learned for myself, beyond doubt, and that is, "Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you: For every one that asketh receiveth; and he that seeketh findeth; and to him that knocketh it shall be opened" (Matthew 7:7-8).

"Boots of faith" make us taller, they help us grow a little at a time. "For behold, thus saith the Lord God: I will give unto the children of men line upon line, precept upon precept, here a little and there a little; and blessed are those who hearken unto my precepts, and lend and ear unto my counsel, for they shall learn wisdom; for unto him that receiveth I will give more; and from them that shall say, We have enough, from them shall be taken away even that which they have" (2 Nephi 28:30 italics added). There are times when we want to know truth and ask for it and receive it, but then, because it doesn't "measure up" we turn away from it and say it isn't truth at all, but "hard to be understood" (2 Peter 3:16) or we "set (it at) naught and trample under [our] feet" or in other words, "hearken not to the voice of His counsels" (1 Nephi 19:7). It isn't easy to "walk by faith" (2 Corinthians 5:7) because we want to "see", not walk. But first, we must "walk" and then we get to "see". And see we will, because faith proceeds the miracle (see Matthew 13:58).

When we want miracles in our lives, or even small changes, we have to be willing to "put on the boots" and walk forward. Peter is a great example of actually putting the "walking" into action. The disciples are on the ship and see Christ walking on the water and at first think that Christ is a "spirit"and are fearful. Christ responds to their fear by saying: "Be of good cheer; it is I; be not afraid.  And Peter answered Him and said, Lord, if it be thou, bid me come unto thee on the water. And He said, Come. And when Peter was come down out of the ship, he walked on the water, to go to Jesus. But when he saw the wind boisterous, he was afraid; and beginning to sink, he cried, saying Lord, save me. And immediately Jesus stretched forth His hand, and caught him, and said unto him, O thou of little faith, wherefore didst thou doubt" (Matthew 14:26-31, italics added). Peter walked on water and was just fine while his gaze was fixed on Jesus Christ. It wasn't until he looked around and saw that the wind was boisterous and he looked away from Christ that he sank. When we put on the "boots of faith" we must be focused on Christ. It is through our faith in Him that miracles will happen. Little by little, or even inch by inch, our faith grows stronger and stronger if we do not cast truth out by doubt (see Alma 32:28-30). The truth with Peter, he really was walking on water. But he began to doubt as he looked away from the source and power of that truth, Christ.

There is a lot to be learned from this story about Peter. He not only had to have faith that Christ had the power to help him walk on the water, but he first had to get out of the boat, the safety of his own knowledge. We must do the same. The Savior does say to us, "Be of good cheer; it is I; be not afraid." (Matthew 14:27) He is really saying, "Be happy; I will give you truth and lead you to it and you don't need to be afraid". When Peter wants to come to the Savior, as we all do, we sometimes want to do it our way. But there really is no other way than getting out of the boat, coming when He bids us to "Come"; and keep our eye single to His glory (see Matthew 6:22; 3 Nephi 13:22; D&C 88:67), completely fixed upon Him. Simply put, when we step out of the boat and leave the safety of our own knowledge and what we understand and "come unto Christ" (Moroni 10:32) we trust that the Lord knows how to make us "walk on water" whether that's walking on the water of discovering for ourselves the truthfulness of The Book of Mormon and then acting on that knowledge, walking on the water of paying tithing when it seems there isn't enough, walking on the water of  forgiving ourselves and others, walking on the water of healing our marriage and our hearts when it seems the only way is divorce, walking on the water of insurmountable pain and enduring to the end, walking on the water of starting our family when we get married. He will help us walk on water in whatever form it is in our life. He "shall lift [us] up" (James 4:10) and gives us the strength (see Philippians 4:13) to do whatever He asks us to do. He won't drop us in the "boisterous wind" and sea if we keep our eye single to Him (see D&C 4:5). We are the ones that look away and lose the strength and power from Him. "For it is by faith that miracles are wrought; and it is by faith that angels appear and minister unto men; wherefore, if these things have ceased wo be unto the children of men, for it is because of unbelief, and all is vain" (Moroni 7:37).

These miracles can and will take place as we put on our "boots of faith" because "we believe all things, we hope all things, we have endured many things, and hope to be able to endure all things" (Article of Faith 1:13).We can get out of the safety of the boat, keep our eyes fixed on Christ, and walk on water even though we can't see the bottom or perhaps even in front of us. Christ does see and He is there to catch us when we look away, just as He caught Peter. This I testify, is how to "walk by faith, not by sight" (2 Corinthians 5:7).